[black-roses]

Hello, I have been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder before my current psychiatrist doesn't believe that disorder is really relevant to me as he feels that ADHD can sometimes appears as borderline personality disorder. If I was to think about it I don't really fit with all the BPD traits anyway as the only ones that affect me are fears of abandonment and impulsivity and that can also overlap into ADHD. Also I find when I am out on mood stabilisers it does nothing for me doesn't control the impulsivity and the heightened emotions. The only things that control those symptoms is my ADHD pills. I don't experience the lashing out and impulsivity that is found in BPD when I am on my ADHD medication. The only symptom that I find hard to treat and no matte what medication I am on I still experience is the abandonment feelings, which for me has almost become a personality trait for me. Which is often why I can get paranoid that people are conspiring against me because I always feel like they are about to abandon me. I have no idea how to treat it as there has been so much confusion as to what I exactly have. I have been diagnosed with so many different illnesses that it's really hard to know what I exactly have. I have been diagnosed with depression, then it was suspected I had bipolar, than melancholic depression, then I have been diagnosed with ADHD, than I was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder and finally I was diagnosed with Mixed depression. It has been a very long ride for me and the main reason it was so hard to get the right treatment was that I was always being changed around the labels of what I exactly have. The first time I ever got any proper help was the first time a psychologist stopped looking solely at my label and asked me to do an in depth 132 question test for my schemes as she was thinking of doing schema therapy on me. To be honest I wish they had done my schemes first and then put me into schema therapy instead of this diagnosis merry go round. Mainly because schema therapy can treat so many things. Also in the past my family has accused me of not wanting help I have even had people that didn't understand any better that I just wanted to be sorry for myself. Maybe I did want to feel sorry but not for the reason they think... Maybe I felt sorry for myself 'because I felt hopeless that no one knew what to do with me and I felt like nobody would ever truly understand me.

[zijax]

I know for me labels have been confusing and limiting. We are all limitless human beings. Infinite... the world is ours. Break out of the box of self absorption. Do something for someone else. Think about someone else. I'm only saying this because it has helped me get better. When I am not well I, I notice I tend to focus on myself and my illness and my problems and that doesn't make me happy. Instead of wanting people to understand you, try to understand someone else. This change in perspective has helped me get outside of myself, maybe it will help you.

[black-roses]

Originally Posted by zijax

I know for me labels have been confusing and limiting. We are all limitless human beings. Infinite... the world is ours. Break out of the box of self absorption. Do something for someone else. Think about someone else. I'm only saying this because it has helped me get better. When I am not well I, I notice I tend to focus on myself and my illness and my problems and that doesn't make me happy. Instead of wanting people to understand you, try to understand someone else. This change in perspective has helped me get outside of myself, maybe it will help you.

Wow I have never thought of it that way. I guess I have been blind to what others my be experiencing how they might view how I experience then... Wow is all I can say.

[black-roses]

Though one thing I know I am trying more is to understand my mother better and how she experiences emotions.