Home Menu

Menu


Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old May 19, 2018, 02:05 PM
jessdb's Avatar
jessdb jessdb is offline
New Member
 
Member Since: Mar 2018
Location: toronto
Posts: 3
hi everyone, i'm 42 and i've had bpd my whole life. i was misdiagnosed up until 5 years ago,

i used to have a lot of destructive friendships and relationships. when i realized i needed to cut them out of my life, all the drama stopped and i felt pretty good about standing up for myself.

but now i feel empty. without the drama for me to worry about, act upon, fret over, i have nothing. i should be relaxed, or at peace having good friendships, but there's just an emptiness inside that scares the **** out of me.

this then leads to my 'identity crisis'. i've always hitched myself to these people: dressing how they dress, listening to their music... and i'm struggling, being 'on my own'.

i'm glad i found this message board, as the last 2 therapists (who said they understood bpd) did not understand bpd. i'm glad i can come here to vent, or learn, and to be around like minded folks.

how do you deal with the feelings of emptiness and despair?
Hugs from:
Anonymous47864, AzulOscuro, Fuzzybear, giddykitty, miss_rainy, mote.of.soul, Skeezyks
Thanks for this!
giddykitty, miss_rainy

advertisement
  #2  
Old May 20, 2018, 02:50 PM
Unrigged64072835 Unrigged64072835 is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Oct 2010
Location: Under the noise floor
Posts: 18,579
Hi Jess and to Psych Central!

How do I deal with the emptiness and despair? I started being creative with that energy I used to spend on other people. I write, take photos, make music...

I also learned from dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT) what to do when I feel those things. Stuff like volunteering, distraction, self-soothing, acting opposite (instead of feeling empty I went to feeling fulfilled, and did things to make my life more fulfilling). I did things that gave me satisfaction in doing in of itself.

I also learned to love myself: getting good sleep, exercise, good food, etc. along with a treat or two.
Thanks for this!
giddykitty, jessdb
  #3  
Old May 20, 2018, 02:54 PM
Skeezyks's Avatar
Skeezyks Skeezyks is offline
Disreputable Old Troll
 
Member Since: Oct 2015
Location: The Star of the North
Posts: 32,762
Hello jess: I see this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral! Here are links to some articles, from PsychCentral's archives, that may be of interest:

https://psychcentral.com/disorders/b...ng-with/?all=1

https://psychcentral.com/lib/the-emo...lity-disorder/

https://psychcentral.com/lib/dealing...lity-disorder/

https://psychcentral.com/lib/dialect...isorder/?all=1

https://psychcentral.com/loneliness/

I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.
__________________
"I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last)
  #4  
Old May 24, 2018, 06:22 PM
jessdb's Avatar
jessdb jessdb is offline
New Member
 
Member Since: Mar 2018
Location: toronto
Posts: 3
thank you
  #5  
Old May 24, 2018, 06:23 PM
jessdb's Avatar
jessdb jessdb is offline
New Member
 
Member Since: Mar 2018
Location: toronto
Posts: 3
i appreciate it
  #6  
Old May 28, 2018, 06:42 PM
elevatedsoul's Avatar
elevatedsoul elevatedsoul is offline
Ascended
 
Member Since: Nov 2013
Location: usa
Posts: 3,836
Yes.. the void is awful 😟
__________________
emptiness
  #7  
Old May 31, 2018, 09:53 PM
Anonymous47864
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
I can relate Jess. Once you see the drama you create to cover up real feelings you don’t want to face, you can’t “unsee” it. It can leave you feeling quite lost but it’s a great starting point right? I intend to start DBT. I believe there’s a workbook for it.
Reply
Views: 831

attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 09:35 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.




 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.