[AzulOscuro]

I would like to know your opinion about my personal case.

On one side, I think that I’m not wrong when I need to know an accurate diagnosis. I have several reasons for it, that is; It’s inherent for me to help someone if I think I can do it. So, I’m very worried about the idea to say or give here a wrong advise if I don’t have the disorder. I’m very concerned about telling someone something out of the wrong starting point. If I say something that I see in a particular way and it’s very different from the way a person diagnosed with bpd, I would be misleading this person.
Another reason for wanting to know an accurate diagnosis is that if I have bpd as a core, any comorbid trait and illnesses are gonna depend on the core and I want to follow the right direction to progress.
Finally, I’m very obsessive and perfectionist and I see as it can be a great problem to know my real me. I see myself totally reflected in what is called, within other names, a quiet borderline but, I’m in such a way that I tend to make a mountain from a grain of sand. Example; If I liked let’s see, an expression said by another person, I copy it and use it in other contexts or with this same person. I spin around this behaviour and jump into conclusion that it’s the chameleon effect.
So, I have many doubts about it.
Self-destructive behaviour: I smoke and I sometimes drink wine or beer. So, I can interpret very rapidly that I display that trait.

Before, I wouldn’t give so many relevance to an accurate diagnosis. I thought...it doesn’t mind as long as I work on these traits, illnesses...but knowing myself a little more and noticing how much perfectionist I am and judgemental with myself, I’m in that moment that I need to know exactly what I have.

Last official diagnosis was personality cluster C. Apart from my social phobia and dysthymia.
It’s not the first time I’m diagnosed with cluster C. But, I learnt that quiet borderline are very frequent misdiagnosed.

What it stopping me from asking my psychiatrist an accurate diagnosis is that I don’t want him to think that I’m questioning his work.

I’m a bit lost. Do you also share my idea that it’s very important to know what your issues are or am I wrong and I could go on working on my traits?
When you were diagnosed, how was the process? Is there a scientific test along with the interviews? Why psychiatrists are so reluctant to give you a label?

Sorry for the long post.

[Goforward]

I feel for you. I was misdiagnosed by my first psychiatrist. He seemed to be reaching for anything to nail down the cause of my psych issues. I like to have an accurate health record since treatment is based on diagnosis. I changed doctors and now have, what I believe is an accurate diagnosis. Could your psychiatrist just have been plain wrong? They have flaws and failings like anyone else. Diagnosis is based on a number of factors and if they can't tick off enough boxes then accuracy is difficult. It's ok, in a tactful way, to express your feelings about the diagnosis. I don't know about testing. When I was diagnosed it was based on history provided by me. I hope this helps.

[mountainstream]

I was misdiagnosed. I was not given sufficient time to describe my feelings and the clinician was not what I was expecting. I too think that quiet borderline probably is often misdiagnosed.

[sarahsweets]

misdiagnosis sucks. What do you feel your diagnosis is most like?

[TishaBuv]

I’m in the same place as you, not sure about diagnosis for Borderline.

True, it is unnerving to think you may have something but not know. I’ve come to not care.

First of all, the treatment/solution for it is the same regardless. If doing DBT helps you then do it.

The big issue is how debilitating is what you are experiencing? I’ve hit some pretty hard lows emotionally and I’m going to keep that trauma in my mind to avoid getting myself to that place again.

The things like mimicking others... I think everyone does that a little. The question is how much does that debilitate you or cause you suffering?

[Fuzzybear]

I feel for you.. I was also misdiagnosed

I agree with the above, about how much do the symptoms affect your life (?)

The effect of the symptoms can be

Hugs

[AzulOscuro]

Originally Posted by Goforward

I feel for you. I was misdiagnosed by my first psychiatrist. He seemed to be reaching for anything to nail down the cause of my psych issues. I like to have an accurate health record since treatment is based on diagnosis. I changed doctors and now have, what I believe is an accurate diagnosis. Could your psychiatrist just have been plain wrong? They have flaws and failings like anyone else. Diagnosis is based on a number of factors and if they can't tick off enough boxes then accuracy is difficult. It's ok, in a tactful way, to express your feelings about the diagnosis. I don't know about testing. When I was diagnosed it was based on history provided by me. I hope this helps.

Yes, I agree with you. I don’t blame them. Maybe, I’m the one who is not right. Psychology is not exact and there are grey areas, difficult to see if you don’t touch all the boxes of this person.
My current psychiatrist is pretty open to his clients. I think I have shared with him much more than with any other one.
Maybe, because I know more about myself, now.
He’s also pretty receptive towards meds. He mainly recommended me therapy and what for meds regards, he’s very aware of my need for the lower dosage as posible to treat my symptoms.

I feel that I can have all the confidence to talk to him about any doubt I have, however it’s not easy for me. I should trust people more bc at that point, I should know that he is smart enough to not feeling questioned and provides me the help and guidance I need.

[AzulOscuro]

Originally Posted by mountainstream

I was misdiagnosed. I was not given sufficient time to describe my feelings and the clinician was not what I was expecting. I too think that quiet borderline probably is often misdiagnosed.

I share your words. Then, there’s the thing with the stigma and the reluctant to put labels bc they don’t want the patient to feel worse with a label and that this label might play a negative role.
Many of them stress on the idea that the DSM is only a tool for communication among the experts and that each patient is different. I understand it. However there are patients who need to know. They need some sort of safety in oder to go ahead on a straight path.

The only fact that from the 9 criteria, you have to display only 5 traits to be diagnosed with bpd, it opens many possibilities and give you an idea of the differences between two persons diagnosed with the same disorder. So, yes...I can see how quiet borderline is not easy to diagnosed. This type of borderline displayed apparently traits that may be seen in cluster C: Avoidance, dependency, internalising rejection and withdrawal...but in the end, the core will be different.
I can see it very clear.

[AzulOscuro]

Originally Posted by sarahsweets

misdiagnosis sucks. What do you feel your diagnosis is most like?

The one I have on my signature but eliciting the word “possibly”.
It was a whole process. I’m not an expert, neither smart enough to self-diagnosed, to be honest.
There were two people here, one of them, a personal friend, who pointed me out that possibility. Of course, they weren’t diagnosing me but it was a help I’m not gonna forget. I was diagnosed many years ago with avoidant personality disorder and strong traits of perfectionism. I swear you that I didn’t know anything about it. When I wondered myself what could be going wrong with me, as far as I got to think was some kind of social phobia and of course, depression.
I guess you know how easy is for a person with borderline personality disorder to feel reflected in any label given to them. So, for years I believed myself what I was told I was but I had some doubts when I compared myself with people with the same disorder than me. The only explanation I found at that moment was, maybe it’s bc I’m lucky and have a big support around me. Then, I received a push by the two people I mentioned and who appreciated me.
Anyway, I’m gonna talk with my psych today. I have the appointment this afternoon and I’m gonna check with him.
I know it can help me.

[AzulOscuro]

Originally Posted by TishaBuv

I’m in the same place as you, not sure about diagnosis for Borderline.

True, it is unnerving to think you may have something but not know. I’ve come to not care.

First of all, the treatment/solution for it is the same regardless. If doing DBT helps you then do it.

The big issue is how debilitating is what you are experiencing? I’ve hit some pretty hard lows emotionally and I’m going to keep that trauma in my mind to avoid getting myself to that place again.

The things like mimicking others... I think everyone does that a little. The question is how much does that debilitate you or cause you suffering?

I can see your point of view and I see it as very valid and insightful.
Since, I saw that knowing better my traits is taking me to get freer and freer from them and be myself, I only want to walk that direction.
A hell, this is the best word to describe how I have been feeling since I was a teenager. I used to write on my journal how I felt buried while alive.
There were moments of hope but never felt freer and more aware and alive than now.

[AzulOscuro]

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

I feel for you.. I was also misdiagnosed

I agree with the above, about how much do the symptoms affect your life (?)

The effect of the symptoms can be

Hugs

I know it, fuzzy. I’m sending you a hug from here.

[bipolarsojourner]

Diagnosing BPD is a tricky beast. I always say that if you went to 5 psychiatrists on the same day, you would get 5 different diagnosis. Additionally, is not uncommon for someone to flop back on forth between BPD and BP or have both. I has a best friend with both who went off her meds. At the end of a month, I did want them as a friend anymore. Cruel. Painful. Brutal. Thankfully, they are back on her meds and we are friends again. Personally, I never want to see Zara, their BPD alter ego, ever again.

Where do you go from here? Work to minimize the symptoms. That can be how your live and act and also can include meds. No matter what, unfortunately it will likely take ore of an effect no matter the diagnosis.

[AzulOscuro]

Updated:
As the previous appointment with my psychiatrist was cancelled bc he reduced his schedule, the appointment was yesterday.
I have opposite feelings about how things went but maybe I’m doing a mountain of a single grain of sand.
I felt very proud of myself because I told him that I would like to tell him a couple of things I kept to myself because I felt shame and I told him how much I was concerned to treat this in order to deep down my diagnosis in case it was necessary with the new information. I apologised him for hiding this information and I told him that I have taken notes.

He seemed to understand me and was pretty receptive.
As I took some notes in order to avoid forgetting important things (not many, only the most meaningful facts since he is the one who can make the best and the needed questions for a diagnosis purpose).
He told me that he needed these notes summarised (he didn’t know how long my notes were) and after the summary, I have to do a diagram).

You can guess now me being so insecure and perfectionist as I am, questioning about if I’m gonna be able to do the diagram suitable or not, well or wrong for the purpose.
I don’t know why I take it with so many doubts.
While walking back home I was making myself all kind of questions: Maybe, he doesn’t want to give me more labels? Maybe, he got upset bc I wasn’t ready to share with him some things until now? Maybe he doesn’t need much more information and he believes I’m gonna make him lose his time? Maybe, he doesn’t feel competent to go deep down bc he is not a therapist.
I made him clear that I need it in order to go on working with a psychologist and by myself.
I thought, if someone is my patient and tells me that (s)he wants to give me a relevant information in order to go on working, I would be more than happy to have a person in front of me that trust me and need to be guided.
Maybe, I’m thinking a lot. What I have clear is that I’m gonna do this diagram even if it’s the last thing I do in this life.