[Sporty McDaniel]

The "I don't know who I am" feeling...

Say I walk into a room for the first time. I don't know how to introduce myself or describe myself.


I feel like, "Who am I?" What is there about me I can describe? Never had a career, or jobs hardly...my core is I'm a drunk (35 yrs sober though) and feel emotionally crappy a lot. So that's how I'd describe myself. But you just don't shake hands with someone for the first time and say, "Hi, I'm damaged."


Anybody have anything to say about this feeling?

[AbladeintheMeadow]

Hi yes I can relate to the feeling of not knowing who I am. It's not just a feeling. I honestly have no idea who I am.

I kinda don't like being self aware. When I didn't know any better I really thought I liked all of the things I did with my friends but now I feel like I'm watching myself from the outside just doing what they do. Different things with different people. I can hold whole conversations on things I had no interest in before I met that person or before they were interested in it. But as soon as those conversations stop there is silence. I have nothing of my own to talk about.

I just feel empty. There is no other way to describe it.

[Skeezyks]

Well... this is at least part of the reason I'm pretty-much entirely reclusive. In my case, though, a lot of it has to do with knowing I could never be honest about who I am as well as having little or nothing I could share in terms of interests or accomplishments. For me, I'd rather just keep to myself than to try to fabricate some story about myself that I think will "play" with people I might come to know.

[BlossomingLen]

I often struggle with figuring out who I am. Especially since my opinions, feelings, thoughts, etc--often switch and change drastically for no real reason. Sometimes they're not even there. It's just completely empty or so blurred that it's difficult to define.

I find myself asking people I know how they view me and I get completely different answers, which confuses me even further.

So I go with the flow. If I don't have an answer for someone's question, I'll just say that I don't. Even if they don't appreciate that. If I do have something to say, I will. Sometimes living in the moment really helps me with my struggles. Perhaps the same could help you...!

Beyond that, if you're financially able, consider talking to someone who specializes in these sorts of topics. Like a therapist. That's only if you're comfortable, of course.

Holding onto healthy habits can help me cope every now and then, too. I walk and do yoga every morning, even if I don't want to. It is good for me and helps me unwind.
Or going onto forums like these, voicing my concerns and communicating with others. That helps me a lot, too.

I wish you the best of luck, regardless! Going through this kind of problem is never fun and I hope things start getting better for you.

[GoldenSnitch]

I don’t know who I am either. I panic when someone asks me to describe myself or introduce myself. I will change what I say I like based on who I’m with to please them and make them like me because I’m terrified of being rejected and alone.

[Caprinaholic]

Finding a hobby helps with self identity - something you're really passionate about, not just to pass time. I've always liked animals, and I raise goats now, so I'm the goat lady. People think it's cool until they find out how much my life revolves around it, lol. I recommend getting into something cheaper and less stressful :P

[FooZe]

Originally Posted by Sporty McDaniel

The "I don't know who I am" feeling...

Say I walk into a room for the first time. I don't know how to introduce myself or describe myself.


I feel like, "Who am I?" What is there about me I can describe? Never had a career, or jobs hardly...my core is I'm a drunk (35 yrs sober though) and feel emotionally crappy a lot. So that's how I'd describe myself. But you just don't shake hands with someone for the first time and say, "Hi, I'm damaged."


Anybody have anything to say about this feeling?

I'd always assumed it was normal. If the occasion that called for introducing myself was that I'd just walked into a room, I'd probably consider what I was in the room for, what others were there for -- and what common interests we might consequently have.

Here's where I posted about this issue before: Meet the Moderators and Administrators!

[Fuzzybear]

Hugs to all. I think finding a hobby can help with self identity.

[GoldenSnitch]

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

Hugs to all. I think finding a hobby can help with self identity.

I think that this is a good point. I have too many hobbies and get overwhelmed with what to choose to do when I have some down time.