[MoxieDoxie]

Binge/Purge or just purge? So T put this question before me:

So, it's important for me to distinguish when you choose self harm vs. eat/purging...is it a matter of where you are(your context)?...like work vs. home or is the choice of which method based on a certain feeling inside?


I tried hard to think and really understand and I came up with this:

[COLOR="rgb(139, 0, 0)"]Bing/purge or just purge can just come on instantly. This usually happens when at the end of the day when everything is done (I am alone) and I sit to relax. I do not remember having that overwhelming child like feeling for comfort. It is more of a need for release. It does not just happen during the evening it has been an ALL day event happening several times in one day (usually on the weekends when I am along overwhelmed with thoughts/emotions). This is difficult to control and usually succumb to it.


Self Harm happens:

When very suicidal
Need to self punish when feeling broken/worthless/useless just bad

Yes I think I feel like something has escaped from the basement when this comes one. It is a desperate, overwhelming need.

[/COLOR]

[ready2makenice]

Purging for me can just be a need to release my anxiety,bingeing usually when I become emotional. Sometimes just eating a snack will build up the anxiety to purge.

It's like I'm afraid of food. Its tough

I usually end up self harming after feeling horrible about purging and the cycle repeats itself....saddd

[liveordie]

i have found for me that i started with self harm i would hurt my self when i was hurting so much i had to release the pressure. some how for me i traded the scars for eating till i hurt then purge to release the pain and the fear of all the calories at once but since i have stopped cutting i now purge more. cutting fells to me more like an impulse it feels good and hurts and is quick. and purging is more like beating myself long and painful almost all day long.