[BaanMoon]

As a child I was always covered in bruises and when the neighbours called social services she said I loved throwing myself down stairs. Many years later she knelt down in front of me frantically saying "I don't want to kill you! I don't want to kill you!" as if trying to convince herself.

All my memories from childhood are of being terrified of her and of violence.
I was an accident and she has openly said she didn't want to have me and she'd leave me for sometimes whole days in my cot as my crying annoyed her.

I once tried to talk to her about how all this has affected my life and she (1) hung up the phone. When I tried to call again she (2) said "Hello? Hello?" as if she couldn't hear me and when I called again she (3) put the fax machine on.

In her mind she believes she is angelic and pure and perfect.. I appreciate the world must be a very confusing place for her sometimes however she has destroyed the lives of her children (one of my sisters tried to kill herself for years finally jumping out of a window) and continues to be psychically damaging to all of us.

The hardest thing for me was to realise it wasn't my fault.

Even though I have moved far away from her, her presence is still always there in my mind. I wish it wasn't.

I wrote a simple song about what I go through every night to get to sleep:

http://bit.ly/2b4aqyd

It would apply to anyone who's been through abuse..

[nicoleflynn]

I like a letter of Restorative Justice....that says...this is what you did, this is how it made me feel. The letter is for YOU. Abusers rarely admit their abuse. Hugs and Love (another person abused by her mother).

[Unrigged64072835]

Originally Posted by nicoleflynn

I like a letter of Restorative Justice....that says...this is what you did, this is how it made me feel. The letter is for YOU. Abusers rarely admit their abuse. Hugs and Love (another person abused by her mother).

I like this idea. It gets the emotions out without expecting a response from the other party.

[leomama]

Originally Posted by BaanMoon

As a child I was always covered in bruises and when the neighbours called social services she said I loved throwing myself down stairs. Many years later she knelt down in front of me frantically saying "I don't want to kill you! I don't want to kill you!" as if trying to convince herself.


All my memories from childhood are of being terrified of her and of violence.

I was an accident and she has openly said she didn't want to have me and she'd leave me for sometimes whole days in my cot as my crying annoyed her.


I once tried to talk to her about how all this has affected my life and she (1) hung up the phone. When I tried to call again she (2) said "Hello? Hello?" as if she couldn't hear me and when I called again she (3) put the fax machine on.


In her mind she believes she is angelic and pure and perfect.. I appreciate the world must be a very confusing place for her sometimes however she has destroyed the lives of her children (one of my sisters tried to kill herself for years finally jumping out of a window) and continues to be psychically damaging to all of us.


The hardest thing for me was to realise it wasn't my fault.


Even though I have moved far away from her, her presence is still always there in my mind. I wish it wasn't.


I wrote a simple song about what I go through every night to get to sleep:


http://bit.ly/2b4aqyd


It would apply to anyone who's been through abuse..

I am sorry. My mother told me my father wanted to abort me and that I pushed my brother down the stairs. When I showed my teacher my bruise she filed a child abuse report. Whenever I try to talk to my mom about anything of substance she says she has to go. Then if I call her back later it goes to voice mail.

My mom thinks that she is helping people by the work she does. She thinks she's doing good because she's working and that makes her better then people who don't. She also thinks she's better then people who aren't as educated as her. One red flag of a narc is advanced degrees.

My mother told me my crying as an infant kept her up at night and made my father late for work.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[KuriWinterSun]

Abused by a brother, I hear your cry for help. It scars us for the rest of our lives. Abusers never see the reality of what they do, even if the person being abused is gone because of it...