[xenos]

Hi everyone.

I'm sure if you've been recovering from a lot of emotional/ cognitive issues, perfectionism and perfectionistic thinking is one the main culprits in our suffering and how we view things in life in general.

So, I think its one of the persistent issues I have, and the more I learn about it the more I become aware and mindful about how it affects my emotional state. For example, and I'm sure most of you know experienced this, when you are progressing toward recovery and work on yourself very hard, you encounter days when you just relapse completely into the depressive mood, low-self esteem, shameful character. And that point you discount and discredit all the progress you have made, and you inner critic almost convince you that what you are trying to change is futile. Perfectionism is a truly damn fierce enemy.

Aside from affecting your overall emotional/cognitive sate, I saw perfectionism also affecting my studies in general. Now that I'm doing my PhD degree, I had and still a tendency to delve deeper into the topic and the quest for understanding every detail is truly overwhelming me and hindering my capability on focusing on the overall picture (what need to be done). For example, when I read a journal paper on something, I get obsessed about every detail in it, in an attempt to understand everything in it. its causes me to procrastinate, and I can attest up to this point of my life, I can't seem to overcome this issue. The issue of detail obsessing, and rationalization.

Anyone did experience this before, and what did you do to alleviate this perfectionistic tenancies?

Thanks a lot

[Unrigged64072835]

I suffer from perfectionism as well. However, I'm sill trying to work this out and don't have any solutions. One aspect, though, that I learned is that the cognitive distortion of black-or-white thinking is predominant. So, the thing is that if one can't do it right the first time then one doesn't do it at all. There is also catastrophic thinking as well. My therapist gave me a magazine article from 1980 that described a lot of it. I get overwhelmed by anything that even looks complicated, and it's holding me back from doing certain hobbies.

[xenos]

Originally Posted by Fharraige

I suffer from perfectionism as well. However, I'm sill trying to work this out and don't have any solutions. One aspect, though, that I learned is that the cognitive distortion of black-or-white thinking is predominant. So, the thing is that if one can't do it right the first time then one doesn't do it at all. There is also catastrophic thinking as well. My therapist gave me a magazine article from 1980 that described a lot of it. I get overwhelmed by anything that even looks complicated, and it's holding me back from doing certain hobbies.

Hi Fharraige,

Yes, complicated things will translate into "chaos" , and therefore no obvious way to find a solution to the issue at hand. I think being aware of the perfectionistic tenancies, and prioritizing " what is important" will focus our cognitive abilities. I saw positivity also contribute to the solution. As a black or white thinking, I always focus on the negative aspect " what if there is no solution, what if there could be something wrong with this or that, ... et". which leads me to think and believe the issue is a failure from the start. So I guess positivity, and accepting the imperfection could help.

my best wishes.

[ThisWayOut]

The one thing that has helped me move away from it a bit is starting to art journal.
The person teaching it encouraged us to keep going, even if it wasn't something we had been aiming for. She had us start with random blobs or lines on the paper, and had us smear unused mediums into other pages in the journal. I slowly learned to let go of the perfectionism (at least in my art journal...for a time). It's kinda opened me up to being ok with not being totally perfect in everything I do. I still struggle a lot with it (and the inaction that comes with the struggle), but putting into practice the lessons from the art journal helps.
You don't have to know how to do anything artistic, just experiment. It's in a book, so it's not like you ever have to show it to anyone if you don't want to... there is a certain amount of freedom in that. (And sometimes it's fun to smear paint around).