[Trace14]

Where did everyone go? Is the forum on fire and no own told me? That's okay I'll put it out and everyone can come back.

[reb569]

I'm here. It's been a rough week. I just couldn't post earlier. Was re-reading about the inner critic and I've come to the conclusion my inner-critic is a major b!tch.

[leomama]

Originally Posted by Trace14

Where did everyone go? Is the forum on fire and no own told me? That's okay I'll put it out and everyone can come back.

Im
Here . I got irritated in another forum and was taking a break. I'm afraid to talk about my ptsd in public because people start putting their own issues on me and then I get mad. I'll try again.

[Trace14]

Originally Posted by reb569

I'm here. It's been a rough week. I just couldn't post earlier. Was re-reading about the inner critic and I've come to the conclusion my inner-critic is a major b!tch.

Well tell her to settle down Maybe find out why she wants to be that way. It gets confusing to me when we talk about inner critic and inner child issues. Makes us seem so much more complicated than we know. Though I'm sure a lot of research has gone into these issues. I guess I'm stuck in the black and white thinking in that it's either this or this, no more no less.

[Trace14]

Originally Posted by leomama

Im
Here . I got irritated in another forum and was taking a break. I'm afraid to talk about my ptsd in public because people start putting their own issues on me and then I get mad. I'll try again.

Why are you getting mad?

[leomama]

Originally Posted by Trace14

Why are you getting mad?

Lol. I explained it in another post.

[reb569]

Originally Posted by Trace14

Well tell her to settle down Maybe find out why she wants to be that way. It gets confusing to me when we talk about inner critic and inner child issues. Makes us seem so much more complicated than we know. Though I'm sure a lot of research has gone into these issues. I guess I'm stuck in the black and white thinking in that it's either this or this, no more no less.

I see a lot of validity in the concept of the inner-critic. When I get really stressed out or make a mistake and get really self-critical, I could imagine the voice was my father's voice, and it's almost a word for word match of what my father used to say. It's eerie in some ways.

[leomama]

Originally Posted by reb569

I'm here. It's been a rough week. I just couldn't post earlier. Was re-reading about the inner critic and I've come to the conclusion my inner-critic is a major b!tch.

Lol, my inner critic is the internalized outer critics in my life.

[Trace14]

Originally Posted by reb569

I see a lot of validity in the concept of the inner-critic. When I get really stressed out or make a mistake and get really self-critical, I could imagine the voice was my father's voice, and it's almost a word for word match of what my father used to say. It's eerie in some ways.

I'm glad you understand it, but hate it's a haunting experience for you. If I make a mistake , it happens, it is what it is a mistake, my poor judgement, but I'm only human and hopefully I learn from the mistake and try to keep it from happening again.
It's a concept I just can't grasp ...inner anything.

[SoupDragon]

Originally Posted by Trace14

. It gets confusing to me when we talk about inner critic and inner child issues.

I struggle with these terms too.

[reb569]

Originally Posted by Trace14

I'm glad you understand it, but hate it's a haunting experience for you. If I make a mistake , it happens, it is what it is a mistake, my poor judgement, but I'm only human and hopefully I learn from the mistake and try to keep it from happening again.
It's a concept I just can't grasp ...inner anything.

For little goofs, I can shake them off, laugh them off, but more serious mistakes, ones that could negatively impact someone, or myself, or when it results in someone being upset with me, those I can't handle, they trigger me big time.

In my case, my inner critic, it's me, but it's me internally verbalizing things that were said to me when I was 5, or 6, or 8 (big one there), or 10 (a really bad year), and on and on. For the most part, it's my father's words, but it's also school days bullies, and in a few cases some of my siblings.

[reb569]

Originally Posted by SoupDragon

I struggle with these terms too.

It is confusing. I had to go back and read about it more in order to come to my conclusion. But I do believe it. I sometimes catch myself "yelling at me" internally, and if I think about it, can often tie that to an event in my childhood/adolescent years. It's the ones I can't tie to anything that I wonder about. I'm guessing they tie back to my memory fragments or maybe they have just been modified by life experiences.

[Trace14]

Originally Posted by reb569

For little goofs, I can shake them off, laugh them off, but more serious mistakes, ones that could negatively impact someone, or myself, or when it results in someone being upset with me, those I can't handle, they trigger me big time.

In my case, my inner critic, it's me, but it's me internally verbalizing things that were said to me when I was 5, or 6, or 8 (big one there), or 10 (a really bad year), and on and on. For the most part, it's my father's words, but it's also school days bullies, and in a few cases some of my siblings.

Another example of how words cut so deeply. Especially if they come from people you care about or look up to. So sorry they are haunting you now. You have to work on knowing you are safe now from those people and their words can no longer hurt you, or threaten you. How about writing all those words you can remember down on a piece of paper, put them in an airtight jar or bag where they can no longer breathe, once you feel like all the words are in that container and dead, then get rid of them. Down the toilet, burn them, trash them, just make sure you put them somewhere they can never come back to you. Make a promise to yourself that those words are now out of you and dead, this it the last you will allow them to be part of your life. Just a thought Sounds a little like an intense ritual but it came from my heart and I felt strongly about expressing this. Maybe it's something I need to do myself. Hmmmmmm

[reb569]

Originally Posted by Trace14

Another example of how words cut so deeply. Especially if they come from people you care about or look up to. So sorry they are haunting you now. You have to work on knowing you are safe now from those people and their words can no longer hurt you, or threaten you. How about writing all those words you can remember down on a piece of paper, put them in an airtight jar or bag where they can no longer breathe, once you feel like all the words are in that container and dead, then get rid of them. Down the toilet, burn them, trash them, just make sure you put them somewhere they can never come back to you. Make a promise to yourself that those words are now out of you and dead, this it the last you will allow them to be part of your life. Just a thought Sounds a little like an intense ritual but it came from my heart and I felt strongly about expressing this. Maybe it's something I need to do myself. Hmmmmmm

I've read about that in the CPTSD workbook I bought. I might try it! It's great advice.