[Trace14]

Since we are thinking that my PTSD possibly started around age 5-6 , this might explain some of my problems in school. Not being able to pay attention, easily distracted, not staying awake, getting that blank stare at the teacher when trying to concentrate on what she was saying but actually hearing nothing, then she would call on me to answer something and I wouldn't have a clue as to what she was talking about, I would say I didn't know the answer and other kids would laugh, and the teacher would get a little angry with me. I guess the teacher just thought I was daydreaming and intentionally not paying attention. There was one teach that caught on that something was wrong, and she would send me to the nurses office everyday after lunch and let me sleep. Again that embarrassed me in front of other students, but now I see she was really helping me. Funny how things start coming together and explaining themselves, I felt like a stupid kid and that something was wrong with me. Maybe it wasn't my fault after all.

[Trace14]

Hmmmmm...just read a little about ADD. It can be hereditary, my mom runs wide open all the time. She talks really fast and doesn't even sit down to eat. Sometimes it's hard to have a conversation with her because her thoughts are all over the place. Sometimes I have to slow her down.
So if she had ADD, then I was born with it, then the trauma around 5-6 starting, my history in school....it's making sense now.

[Unrigged64072835]

My problems were more lack of social skills when I was a child. I didn't learn tact or discretion, and i pretty much blurted out what was on my mind. I was ostracized heavily for that.

[Trace14]

Originally Posted by Fharraige

My problems were more lack of social skills when I was a child. I didn't learn tact or discretion, and i pretty much blurted out what was on my mind. I was ostracized heavily for that.

Mine was the opposite, Dad felt little girls were to be seen and not heard and I knew the consequences if I got out of line with that.

[reb569]

Originally Posted by Trace14

Since we are thinking that my PTSD possibly started around age 5-6 , this might explain some of my problems in school. Not being able to pay attention, easily distracted, not staying awake, getting that blank stare at the teacher when trying to concentrate on what she was saying but actually hearing nothing, then she would call on me to answer something and I wouldn't have a clue as to what she was talking about, I would say I didn't know the answer and other kids would laugh, and the teacher would get a little angry with me. I guess the teacher just thought I was daydreaming and intentionally not paying attention. There was one teach that caught on that something was wrong, and she would send me to the nurses office everyday after lunch and let me sleep. Again that embarrassed me in front of other students, but now I see she was really helping me. Funny how things start coming together and explaining themselves, I felt like a stupid kid and that something was wrong with me. Maybe it wasn't my fault after all.

I also experienced a lot of this. I had a hard time paying attention in class, at least after Kindergarten anyway where I was punished a lot because I really had no idea how to play with kids my own age and I was used to having to fight to keep any toy I was playing with. That didn't go over well and my most frequent memory of Kindergarten was being put over the teachers knee and being spanked while my classmates counted how many spanks I got. By first grade I had no spirit left. Just stared out the window or at the floor or my desk.

[Trace14]

Originally Posted by reb569

I also experienced a lot of this. I had a hard time paying attention in class, at least after Kindergarten anyway where I was punished a lot because I really had no idea how to play with kids my own age and I was used to having to fight to keep any toy I was playing with. That didn't go over well and my most frequent memory of Kindergarten was being put over the teachers knee and being spanked while my classmates counted how many spanks I got. By first grade I had no spirit left. Just stared out the window or at the floor or my desk.

I understand, if there was a window I was mentally out there some where doing something. Do you think this was from trauma at that point or maybe ADD yourself?

[reb569]

I don't think I have ADD, I really looked very closely at that when I was in college and I really didn't fit the disorder. I think it was from trauma. One of the other things that I remember from Kindergarten was for "Show in Tell", as usual I didn't bring or have anything to say this one time. The teacher came down on me and told me that I had to share something since I didn't bring anything. I looked up at her and told her, "Last night my Daddy beat up my Mommy". She was shocked and I don't think she ever pushed me to take part again. My father had us totally isolated from everyone. The day I walked into Kindergarten I freaked out because I had no idea there we so many kids my age.