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Member Since Feb 2019
Location: GA
Posts: 5
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#1
I am new here, and assume my post has been addressed in the past. But since I’m new, maybe forgive please. Triggers, stupid, dumb, recurring things that are meaningless out of context, but just send my emotions skyward. Just now, as every year this time, there are advertisements by local groups on TV, wanting to create wonderful high school prom experiences for disadvantaged girls. While I did get to go to a couple of high school proms, and other high school ‘date’ dances, I never had the chance to shop for a prom dress, shoes, makeup, hair salon, jewelry, none of it. My parents were both malignant narcissists, and would never allow for any of the household budget to be spent on me. No braces for my horrible crooked teeth, no dermatologist treatment or acne products for my ice pick scar creating acne, certainly not a pretty dress for prom. I was always able to borrow a dress, shoes, wrap, from another girl who would never wear the same dress a second time. Why, oh why, did my parents not love me? Today I understand they were ugly people on the inside, but the triggers...decades later. The scars. I don’t think I will ever recover from their abuse. Ever. Last edited by Jeribelle2000; Feb 08, 2019 at 06:26 PM.. Reason: Msispelling |
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Bill3, Fuzzybear, LifelongLoner, Open Eyes, seeker33
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LifelongLoner
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 23,176
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#2
Hi Jeribelle, welcome to PC.
I was going to ask you how old you are, but I can see you are retired and a grandmother. Sorry that you are struggling through these old memories like this. Have you been seeing a therapist at all? |
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New Member
Member Since Feb 2019
Location: GA
Posts: 5
5 |
#3
Quote:
Working through a lot of things. Right now I’ve got my hands full with I’ll health, plus caring for my sick spouse. He had lung cancer surgery right before Christmas, and a lot of complications, back and forth to hospital, every test, procedure, surgery, complications. I’m doing everything here, got him home now. Good thing I have two machines for oxygen, because we ended up using my portable oxygen concentrator for him for a while. He’s stabilized now, but I sure don’t need the Flying Monkeys circling right now. |
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LifelongLoner, Open Eyes
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Member Since Nov 2018
Location: Long Island, NY
Posts: 125
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#4
Quote:
Like you, I had very crooked teeth that were never fixed. I had to pay for my own prom with savings from my summer job. She never said a word about love to me or my siblings - there was no advice at all, and we were discouraged from dating. She never even fed us breakfast because she said it was an unnecessary meal. I was the skinniest, palest most underdeveloped kid in grade and high school. I had no friends and no one cared. Somehow, I survived. I don't know how. I guess I learned to take care of myself though my life has been hard. I am deeply scarred emotionally. You are not alone. Other survivors stand with you and understand. |
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Fuzzybear, Open Eyes
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#5
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