Welcome to Coping with Emotions

It is hard to know what you are feeling or what to name the feelings if you were never allowed to "feel". I would have to say that there is such a war inside of feelings that I don't know what to call them.

Sometimes I feel like I'm the world's most emotional man. But I guess some of this is part of being bipolar. Or, actually, in my case a lot of it is about being bipolar.

I cry easily, but not unnecessarily. In other words, when I cry, there's something to cry about... but it doesn't have to be something that would cause many others to cry. (I even cry at sappy commercials).

Anyway, good topic.

This topic certainly applies to me. Emotions always get in my way. How's that for a black-and-white statement? I am pondering how to have the appropriate emotions toward my two deceased parents. My mother was an abusive alcoholic and my father enabled her. Yet, they both provided me with many travel and educational opportunities. I am grateful for the advantages - music lessons - but hate them for the many beatings and verbal abuse I endured. and also my father, a physician who could have gotten my mother into psychiatric treatment but didn't, who stood by and did nothing. He was a doctor (died last Dec. 10) My mother would even tell him to hit me with his belt. He obeyed. He loved my mother to the end. SHe abused and even hit him too. The reason for his unfailing loyalty to her is a mystery to me. I feel guilty about hating them. SOrry if my verbiage is a little convoluted. The emotions arising from me while writing this are getting in the way of rational communication.

I am emotionally challenged to say the least. I never seem to have the right emotion at the appropriate time. This is one thing I need to work on.

Thanks for welcoming me. I am really confused about how all my emotions relate to one another. as an artist and as a regular woman, its really hard not to be able to understand yourself.

I have always had a hard time expressing how I feel to others. I would like to be able to talk to people and share my emotions. Sometimes all you need is a kind ear to listen.
Thank You
Reesa

I too have a struggle with my emotions. My husband and son have battled depression for many years and the stress in our home can be overwhelming at times. It seems as though as time has gone on, I can't handle things the way I did in the past. Now, I will be angery, laugh or cry, sometimes all within an hour.
I recently started therphy and I am hopful this will help me manange my reactions to the stress in my life.

I've alway been taught that showing emotion is a sign of weakness therfore, I do not want to open up about those feelings. I have been in therapy for many years and still don't feel that I can them out. I'm afraid of judgement. Currently I am attending group therapy and don't feel that I am getting much from it. Wondering if it's because I'm afraid to open up.

I hate feeling the way I feel

When it comes to emotion for human, I categorize it to two different types. Instinctual or animal kind of emotions (such as fear, content, sadness, ego, etc.) , and intellectual ones (such as jealousy, greed, love, disappointment, etc.). And I believe, that climate and culture has a lot to do with which one people seek for. Tell me if I am wrong, but I have noticed, looking at the people from different parts of the world, those that naturally and biologically are more likely to experience the instinctual emotions, are the ones that look more for the second kind. That's why I see more of emotions such as love, jealousy, greed in warm climate, as for people from colder climate are more inclined to find a way to experience the first kind. That being said, it agrees with the biological explanation of emotion, which is a biochemistry reaction caused by hormones in human. Climate, and food are the two major factors on hormones level in people, therefore, they also affect their emotions.

If one is not satisfied with what his or her biochemistry is creating in form of emotions, the best way to cope with it is to change those two factors first. To put it in a metaphor, if your body can not deal with spicy food, then change your diet!

A friend of mine, a very hot blooded guy, who was the person that always his out of control emotions were getting a best of him in any social situation (and of course causing a lot of grief) followed my advice. Changed his diet and the climate he lived in, and now he is in a full control of his emotions. However, since what he is doing is against his nature, it is making him a none satisfied and unhappy person, but at least he is in control!

I know the feeling. I have the same issues sometimes.

Right now I am having a hard time keeping my emotions at bay. I used to be able to go my usual business but now it's like my emotions are at overdrive that it's making it difficult for me to focus on the things that make me happy. Any advice for how I can better get back on track? thanks

HELP ME PLEASE

My emotions seem to try to get the better of me so I just cut them off completely and go numb. I know thats not the was to handle my emotions but I don't know what else to do before my emotions would break me down completely.

[/COLOR][/FONT]HOW Courtney? Are you feeling? Are you numb? What is your fear? Did something happen to initiate you needing help or were you feeling bad void of any certain cause? I would help if I could -- I can be someone that cares how you are doing. Help me to help you by expressing more...

I think that going numb is sometimes our last resort for survival and that it has to be okay when that's all we can do. I struggle with being able to control or contain my emotions which does not always involve how I interact with others -- sometimes it's just about how I am with myself and the busy thoughts that I am consumed by. Mostly that I am too much for people. Too sensitive, too emotional, too dramatic, too passionate. I don't want to be anything to the extent of being "too much" so much so that others don't really know how to deal with me. I don't know where I'm going with what I have said. My intent was to respond in a hopefully helpful way to your message. Mostly, I guess I would say not to be hard on yourself when you feel the only option for dealing with your emotions is to go numb. If it gets you through then it must be okay. And when it feels safe enough to feel again maybe it would be a good idea to try to identify and understand the emotions that left you overcome. And if you feel ready, try to explore finding the simple hows and whys of your emotions. Hopefully, in such a way that you would come away knowing more and being less vulnerable to your emotions. This is something I should apply to my own experiences. I hope that what I've said makes sense.

Feeling intense sadness. As soon as meds kick in I'm going to bed...can't deal with this.

It's been a while since I felt intensely sad. It was an exquisitely beautiful experience. I was grieving over the suicide of a friend.
I very much enjoyed the feeling of sadness, it was transporting, transforming, and very relaxing. At times my breath slowed to almost seeming to stop, music became profound, infinity seemed to pour in from some kind of absolute stillness.
I reveled in it and concentrated often to linger in the emotion as much as I could.
Alas, I cannot conjure up these states at will , they have a life of their own, eventually my long term sadness passed.

That seems to be the general rule ,ie the more one accepts and loves one's negative emotions the less likely they are to stay and the more one runs form them the more power they get. But 'mother psychology' cannot be tricked, if she senses you are trying to enjoy the emotions to make them go away then she she will bring them back in force. 'Mother psychology' always demands absolute honesty.

To my understanding, there is the emotion which is inside me and part of me, as I have accepted these emotions I love their expression and there is the external event the loss of a friend which is outside of me and the pain is my consciousness of it. So perhaps the sadness is the buffer between, a soothing of the external destructive event to the internal of me.
In any case the emotions, and this emotion is me, it is myself and as I love and accept myself ( an ongoing process which has been progressive) I love all my emotions without reservation. It takes a while though to learn this, and not everyone want to do so. But the choice to progress towards acceptance is always there.

Thanks for sharing. I am sorry for the loss of your friend, but, was touched by what you had to say, It would be good for me to make the choice to "progress towards acceptance" (as you say) of my emotions. Instead of embracing my emotions I am often frightened or controlled by them, which is a difficult path to walk at times.

It seems as if all I feel is anger and sad i dont really remember what "true" happy feels like... And my anger is scary bad I punch things,(to the point of breaking my hand a few times) I yell and scream, and even hurt myself in the past just to get it out (cut myself, bit myself)... It is like no matter how many time I punch something or no matter how loud I yell I cant get out my anger.....And I dont know what to do but I cant keep doing this.... And its like NO MATTER WHAT I cant find something or someone that gets me mad... My boyfriend tells me that its is ok cause I have had a hard life, I have seen and gone thru alot of things that i have never dealt with.. And then when i told my counseler what he said she said he was right and It is ok cause i have never hurt anyone else??? I dont understand this I what/need to change.. And Nobody well help my by telling my what to do and how to change.. And then on top of the anger i already had this got me os mad that I left counseling half way thru but not befor I lost is on her.. Yelling "I dont give a **** cause i could and alot of people have had thing happen to them and they have not turned out crazy and hating the world".. And i know she didnt do anything but I am NOT ready to deal with the things from when i was younger i cant change them but i am wanting to fix the things i can change but i dont know how to even start....