[Stranger516]

One day, after I am done with college, I will have a career that will give me the opportunity to help others. I would love to work in a hospital either in an oncology unit, in critical care, or in pediatrics/obstetrics.... however I feel like my entire world will be crushed when/if someone passes away. I want to be there for them, even if they are on their way out of this world I want to make the transition a peaceful one. I am just afraid that I will be devastated for the ones who don't make it. I want to be emotionally strong for them, but I feel like that will result in me being emotionally unstable and will cause me to fall apart.

Any advice?

i think it's great you have such an urge to help others.

the only thing i'll say on the dying/ leaving this world is, remember... it's a part of the job- it is bound to happen- and remember that it's not because of anything you did. tell yourself you're really good at your job. keep telling yourself.. you did all you can for the person- and maybe after a few times, you may get used to it.

[lynn P.]

I agree with shattered sanity. I wasn't exposed to death until around age 24 and it shook me up. As I've matured I realize its part of life and yes its still hard but tolerable. Naturally if you have this deep urge to help others, you'll also feel loss when they pass..... but you can learn to accept it as part of the job.

The fact you'll be helping them when they need it most, is something to be proud of. I think many in the world don't know how to handle death. Life is a circle and death happens - it takes a special person to reach out to someone who's near the end and they need this contact. Better for a vulnerable patient to have someone like yourself, than a cold unfeeling person. Good luck with your career.

Suffering and death are inevitable...as is serenity and birth. To find the impermanence, beauty and growth in all things, I think we can ease our own suffering. Compassion is essential, especially a person going into such a field of service to others...however, it can take its toll to those unprepared as you fear.

We also don't want to become callous and cynical toward pain, either. If hospice care is your goal, I would suggest you also focus on self-care and always have a good therapist who understands grief...Keep regular appointments and check in -- venting your own suffering is important too. Prepare yourself by knowing that you will see suffering, pain and death...you will experience grief and loss. Although accepting these facts doesn't ease the emotional burden, it can however prepare us to take steps to care for ourselves.
I have also found that a regular meditation practice can lessen emotional stress and pain. In fact, I read an article that those who meditate and practice mindfulness have less activity in their amygdalas (the emotion center in the brain).
http://www.international.ucla.edu/bu...parentid=72539

I personally could not go into such a field, however if you feel you are emotionally prepared and are accepting that it won't always be easy, I find it admirable. Best wishes.