[thebutcherbunny]

Hello,

I don't know how to talk about this, but I will start by saying that I'm frustrated person. My frustrations lead to anger, my anger leads to abusive paths. Ultimately it comes from a lot of pain and feelings of inadequacy. I'm my biggest critic and sometimes I may be too hard on myself, then again, maybe I'm not hard enough on myself.

I'm a self loather and yet I have confidence. What triggered today's anger, which I feel is justified was a message to me explaining I'm really unattractive in a facetious way. It hurt to be so dismissed and so attacked when I was offering a friendly conversation with no intentions outside of talking.

When this was said to me, I couldn't help but feel belittle and so I responded quickly calling the woman a (rhymes with hunt) and wished her a happy life with mediocrity. Which was equally wrong on my part. I wish I wouldn't have said what I said. But it just hurt me to be called ugly. I'm a 28 year old man, and things like this shouldn't phase me in the least, but I find more and more that these things do other me. It could be that I've been belittle and called names from an early time on, and even my therapist tells me I've been through a lot of BS. I know you can't please everyone, you can't make everyone like you either. But when in the hell did society become so mean and hateful. Have we all forgot the majority of us are working class people?

I'm also not an ugly man. I'm overweight, but I'm not ugly.

[Travelinglady]

I am sorry this woman was so insensitive. I don't know why our society is getting so mean, but I do have some ideas, such as how we are now raising our children.

I can understand your anger. I am glad you have a therapist to work with to help you to deal with situations such as these. Perhaps you did overreact a bit. I think ideally such people should be told they were wrong, but maybe in not such a coarse way.

I am sure you are not ugly. As far as being overweight, I am, too.

[wadingthruemotions]

Originally Posted by PAYNE1

I am sorry this woman was so insensitive. I don't know why our society is getting so mean, but I do have some ideas, such as how we are now raising our children.

I can understand your anger. I am glad you have a therapist to work with to help you to deal with situations such as these. Perhaps you did overreact a bit. I think ideally such people should be told they were wrong, but maybe in not such a coarse way.

I am sure you are not ugly. As far as being overweight, I am, too.

I agree fully with what you say.

I am overweight as well. Try not to let this get you down in the long run. Allow your anger to subside and try to think as rationally as you can is all I can offer from experience. It is not easy, I know.
We are here if you need to vent.

[Thunder Bow]

Invalidating is a cultural imprint put on us from birth. The best Personal Validation always comes from within. If you are worried about being over weight, eat less and get outdoors for excercise. That part is very easy to do and you will feel much better over all.