Sometimes I feel I try hard to engage with other people and get them to feel free to open up with me and for us to build stronger connections but I get so angry when I feel like they don't notice it or respond to it. Like you send someone a big email or message and the reply back with a few words, that just makes me so darn mad. Why do people do that? I think if people don't feel like they ever will have a lasting connection with you then they should just tell the other person instead of leaving them thinking that something might come out of the conversations. Meh.

[basty_407]

Completely agree with you. Some people don't even bother to make that extra step to be accommodating and engage people. I've always believed that people will only pay attention to you if they are interested to a certain extent. Otherwise, they wouldn't even bother.

[arachnophobia.kid]

I get what you're saying.

I can sometimes be a little bit hurt by this kind of thing too. But I don't know, over the years of having this kind of thing happen to me I tend to think of it like this: people are just not so perfect you know?

I mean some people are just bad at replying. I have one friend and I know she's just never going to reply to things I send her so I've stopped sending her long emails, instead I just call her if I want to talk to her or I wait til the next time I see her. She doesn't mean anything by not replying, she's just a little immature and inconsiderate with this kind of thing. She knows it too and so it's no big deal.

Also some people just don't really pick up on the idea that you are reaching out and that this is important to you. They don't mean anything by responding with just a few words and they certainly don't mean to hurt you.

I'm also just going to go ahead and say that some people are just really afraid of intimacy, I know I am sometimes and it's not because I don't want to share intimacy with people. It's just that it can be scary to expose yourself to someone and it's not always safe, some people will react negatively, don't you think? Perhaps you are picking people who are unsafe to open up to.

However it's true that there are also some jerks too. But in that case, who cares? You don't want to know those people anyway if they won't be a good friend to you. It still might hurt when they ignore you or if it seems they don't care, but it's best to try and shrug it off, they're not worth your time.

[hamster-bamster]

If the response is brief but relevant, that means that they have read your email. If the response shows that they have not actually read your email, then it is another story. In other words, some people are brief and to the point and others are brief and vapid - a huge difference.

[Gus1234U]

sadly, as i am still learning, demanding that other people behave as i want them to is a failed strategy.

From someone who is naturally very selective about who she decides to be open with, or with whom she decides to foster strong connection:

It can take me a very long time, often, for me to be as comfortable with other people as they are with me. I am usually pretty cautious and tend to be pretty gradual in how I let people in. To some people this is obvious and to some not.

Because there are certain things that I am pretty free and open with, many people don't consider that I am often afraid to be open with people in a general sense... frequently I get a similar frustrated response as the OP has described.

I don't know if this is the case in your situation, Dylan, but it is one possibility that you might want to consider.