[Anxiousvalkyrie]

I posted on the relationships board about some problems I'm having with my twin sister. I find myself getting increasingly frustrated and angry with her and I can't let it go. These emotions are effecting me to the point that I have dreams about the situation with her at night and wake up angry. I don't know why I can't let it go. The anger makes my generalized anxiety worse and some days, especially if she's been texting me incessantly, it's consuming.

[sideblinded]

Hi Anxiousvalkyrie

I am sorry that you are struggling with anger and it is causing you sleep and anxiety problems. I always wanted a sister but I got an abusive brother instead. I can't imagine what it is like to have a twin sibling. I would talk to your sister about the things that are eating at you about her actions. I believe it is the only way that you can get your life back. Anger can be a good thing when in the right situation but if not used in the correct way, it can make us miserable and it can steal our happiness.

Whenever we have anger we must also have the wisdom to use it correctly. I was reading a book about this as I also have some anger issues that I need to work on.
In my case, the person that I am having a problem with is not in my life anymore. She is in your life and I know that you love her so if you can just talk with her and do it because you love yourself as well it might help. I wish you the best in this and let us know how it goes. I hope that you get some good sleep soon and that you are able to cope better with your anxiety. ((hugs))

[gayleggg]

I find that anger can make my anxiety worse, too. I would suggest learning relaxation methods such as progressive muscle relaxation, breathing exercises or mediation. These can help slow down you breathing and ease anxiety. Practicing before going to bed could leave you more relaxed and less likely to have the anger provoking dreams. There are a lot of examples on YouTube and various other sites. Here is the breathing technquic I use:
Take a deep breath in through your nose to the count of 4.
Hold your breath to the count of 7.
Exhale through your mouth to the count of 8.

I do this 10 times to relieve anxiety symptoms. It takes practice.

When you are concentrating on your breathing it is hard to pay attention to anything else. Good luck. I hope things get better.

[Anxiousvalkyrie]

Thanks for your advice and encouragement. I very much appreciate it *hugs*

[BLUEDOVE]

Here's a nice reply to any email that is critical:
"As much as I'd like to accommodate you,I've got into such a
habit now of judging my own behavior,I couldn't possibly
burden you with that task."
Enjoy,
BLUEDOVE

[Fuzzybear]

[Fuzzybear]

Originally Posted by BLUEDOVE

Here's a nice reply to any email that is critical:
"As much as I'd like to accommodate you,I've got into such a
habit now of judging my own behavior,I couldn't possibly
burden you with that task."
Enjoy,
BLUEDOVE

[spiritoday]

Letting go is just another way of saying forgiveness. Forgiving resolves our anger completely. But most people can’t forgive the most terrible things at first. It takes practice. Start small. Start small with someone you actually like right now. Forgive them for something small they did you irritate you.

Forgiving is an emotional muscle.

We forgive to get them out of our heads. Sure, it might help them too but it is more for us. Most other people usually forget about how they have wronged people. Staying mad at them does not help us that much unless we do something about it.

Trust is not forgiveness.

That has to be earned but we seem to forget that too.