[vital]

My feelings are sooooo stupid.

For about 45 seconds today, I was angry at someone for something that they I was imagining that they MIGHT do in the future. Isn't that crazy??

- vital

[Beachlover527]

I mean it doesn't seem abnormal. If someone made you angry in the past, you can imagine they would do it again.
If you think someone will make you angry, it's best to avoid being around that person. They are just causing stress upon you and it seems like you already know it.



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[vital]

Thanks Beachlover;

Unfortunately, in my work I do have to deal with people that I don't trust at all. I always find that unpleasant. - vital

[annoyedgrunt84]

We can be pretty good at coming up with scenarios that exist no place but in our own heads. I do it all the time.

[vital]

Originally Posted by annoyedgrunt84

We can be pretty good at coming up with scenarios that exist no place but in our own heads. I do it all the time.

Thanks a lot, annoyedgrunt84 & Beachlover. I really appreciate your comments. This kind of thing used to torture me endlessly in the old days. Now it's only a brief unpleasantness kind of thing. Wheeeee...

I hope you're both doing OK this evening. I just got back from yoga and am feeling all nice and calm and refreshed.

- vital

[Beachlover527]

That sucks that the person is at your work. It would be hard to avoid them.

Even though they are not your cup of tea; my best advice is to be patient and try to just try to be kind/not hateful towards them. They probably have personal issues that they brought out on you and the workplace.

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[cluelessgal]

Feelings are not stupid - feelings are just feelings. If you sit back and analyze, you may get to the root cause of those feelings.

I completely understand as I get fitful feelings of the same.

[bugbear83]

Just curious; do you find yourself imagining whole complex scenarios where another person wrongs you and you're forced to deal with that stress and trauma? I do this alllll the time unfortunately. I come up with what they might say and then react to it in my head, as if it's really happening.

I've learned to try and catch myself when I do it before it goes too far and affects my overall mood for the day, and try to spend a good couple of minutes reminding myself of reality. What they REALLY said and REALLY did. Self care and comfort for what amounts to a pretty stressful situation.

I don't think your feelings are stupid, personally I think it's a defense mechanism. Try to deal with a hurt before it even happens you know?

I imagine the whole scenario(s) right down to the word by word conversation. I am constantly trying to avoid confrontation from these imagined situations. Makes me very anxious.

I am always second guessing what people will say, i set myself up with imagination. just live the day and don't worry what others will think or say about you. just have fun enjoying yourself throughout the day. to project what ifs get us all in trouble. it is so much easier to drop the guard on stuff that i think might happen and just relax with what is around me. i think too much and get myself in trouble. just enjoy your environment and support group and let be tomorrow that isn't even here yet. we all do it so i speak from experience. life is so much easier. blessings.

[vital]

Originally Posted by bugbear83

Just curious; do you find yourself imagining whole complex scenarios where another person wrongs you and you're forced to deal with that stress and trauma? I do this alllll the time unfortunately. I come up with what they might say and then react to it in my head, as if it's really happening....

I used to do that all the time. I still have that tendency to some extent, but I always catch myself these days.

Originally Posted by bugbear83

...
I don't think your feelings are stupid, personally I think it's a defense mechanism. Try to deal with a hurt before it even happens you know?

I think you're right. I was partly joking. Those emotions are more "dysfunctional" that "stupid." My brain is trying to protect me and planning for difficult situations does help sometimes. You've just got to be able to STOP planning !!

- vital

[bugbear83]

Dysfunctional is definitely a good term. These plans do not actually help us! They hurt us! Make it stop please!!

Ugh but I feel you. It helps sometimes to joke about things.

[Pierro]

You are just thinking of the worst case scenario, which I do all the time. Its self preservation in a way. Trouble is its all "if". Just because you feel these emotions does not meant they are correct. (this is what I keep telling myself) Best wishes

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[Thunder Bow]

It is better to understand our feelings rather than judge them.