[Mysterygirl202]

Today my best friend told me she hates herself... But she wouldn't tell me why. Little does she know that I a lot of the time hate myself too. This bothers me so much that she won't tell me why and that I feel like such a hypocrite telling her she shouldn't keep things from me. I don't know why but this makes me feel so overwhelmed like I just want to explode. What do I do?

[Penny T. StDuhnam]

I wish I had an answer.

[shezbut]

Mysterygirl202,

I understand the self-hate very well. I've been feeling that for 30+ years myself. IMO, there are pretty deep reasons for such strong emotions. Your friend may not be ready to share such vulnerable parts of herself.

Personally, it's a lot easier for me to express my self-hate than it is for me to discuss the reasons why I feel so strongly. I feel deep shame, which contributes to the self-hate. Sharing my reasoning takes a lot of trust and some feeling of acceptance.

You're friend simply may not be ready to share such intimate details of her emotional world...as it often makes those feelings more intense. Try to keep these points in mind when you find yourself frustrated with your friend for not sharing her personal experience/s with you.

Are you hopeful to share your personal experience with the self-hate, and perhaps her resistance is what's made you feel so angry?? Or, maybe you've never felt ashamed of your self-hate and hadn't thought of that being a possibility for your friend? Just ideas...

Hope that helps you re-gain a better sense of control over your emotions. Best wishes to you!

[RandomtheCrazilyFab]

Originally Posted by Mysterygirl202

Today my best friend told me she hates herself... But she wouldn't tell me why. Little does she know that I a lot of the time hate myself too. This bothers me so much that she won't tell me why and that I feel like such a hypocrite telling her she shouldn't keep things from me. I don't know why but this makes me feel so overwhelmed like I just want to explode. What do I do?

I'm trying to teach my best friend to sing. She isn't the best, but she will get there! I'm very good, and I think that because I'm so used to singing, and because I'm confident enough in my voice to let it get louder, she get's kinda embarrassed. It kinda makes me wish I sucked at singing XD
But sooner or later, she will have to realize that this is the only her she ever gets, so she might as well embrace it!

And anyways, I'm not going anywhere until she has something to admire about herself!