[smartiesparty]

but i'm not. the fear of abandonment hasn't been this strong in months. i will never heal. i'm untreatable. i have been shaking with fear and nervousness for the past 2 hours. what if my family or boyfriend leaves me ?
i know i couldn't continue living
i always play horrible scenes in my head
i don't want people to abandon me
i can't talk to anyone about it. my next psychotherapist appointment is in 2 weeks
i'm so scared i can't stop crying. i took a nordaz to calm myself
what do i do ?

[avlady]

you've got a case of the "what if's". i get this way often and my therapist said to say to the question "so what". that helps sometimes

[Thunder Bow]

"What If" and "I Can't Make It On MY Own" goes together perfectly! Those are imprints made on you by your parents and society. Just know that those are just imprints that have nothing to do with you. Just keep working with your therapist, just as you have been doing.

You've got Catastrophic Thinking fueling your Abandonment Anxiety. There are some great worksheets online that have helped me strategize my way through such thinking.

Basically it means comparing Worst Case Scenarios against Best and Most Likely - and how to plan for the event of the Worst Case. At the end of such homework I feel better at the realization the Worst has a reletively small chance of happening - and more confident in what to do in the event it does.

Another helpful strategy is to compare a list of Evidence For (a situation/event) to that of Evidence Against.

These are real eye openers and help me cope through the worst of my worries. In fact I am presently facing a particularly trying situation but completing such strategies are helping me manage.

We live in a harsh world, and we need someone around us to feel safe and loved, at least sometimes, but why do you think your family or boyfriend would abandon you?

[smartiesparty]

Originally Posted by Nickname

We live in a harsh world, and we need someone around us to feel safe and loved, at least sometimes, but why do you think your family or boyfriend would abandon you?

because i'm not lovable
i'm hard to love and do things wrong
i disappoint my family

Originally Posted by smartiesparty

because i'm not lovable
i'm hard to love and do things wrong
i disappoint my family

We all do things wrong. People are more accepting that you think, especially your family.

[frankenhooker90]

everybody is lovable no one is not

[littleowl2006]

two things I need to remind myself of whenever I am in a desperate state:
1) This too shall pass
and (as my friend L once said) 2 : The sun also shines when it is hidden behind the clouds.
Be good to yourself

[LucyD]

Have you tried positive affirmations? You can practice by telling yourself that you are the opposite of what you think. Like you think you are unloveable but you can tell yourself that you are loveable.