[otherg]

My daughter was on probation for the last two years. Her offences were due to narcotics addiction and stealing money from her employer. She missed several appointments with her probation officer(probably cuz she was using cocaine) and was arrested. She spent two weeks in The HOUSE OF CORRECTION. She was transferred to a halfway house to spend 90 days there. She exaggerated the hardship her boys and their father were experiencing but I didn't know that until after I obtained a check to payoff her debts to start fresh. I told him to hang onto the check as long as he wanted to keep her at the halfway house. He gave her PO the check right away so she'll be released in two weeks.

I'm realizing now how she told lies to him and I for the last several months. I'm regretting that I didn't hold onto the check. We're uncertain she'll finally stay clean and stop lying to us. I don't know if they'll accept her into a rehab program. She suffers from depression as well. I'm just feeling horrible today. I'm so down. It's a beautiful day today and I can't enjoy it. I felt decent yesterday but today I'm just sick about this. I don't want her here if he doesn't want her at their apartment. I'm just so raw and hurting.

I feel so badly for you.

Lately I have responded to a couple of posts about the trial of parenting. It's pretty much a given that we will feel like failures at some point in the journey.

The best I have learned to do is forgive myself if I make mistakes. Make peace with the fact that your kid(s) are not who you dreamed they would be. But there is still time.

I have to tell myself all of the time that I will always be a mom, but the time that I am actively parenting has ended. All I can do is offer advice.

You are doing the best you can. When a person lies, then I think they know that they have lost trust and have to prove themselves over and over.

It sounds like you could benefit from counselling of some sort to help you understand that you are a human being. Remember that you can only help someone who wants to be helped.

[Thunder Bow]

No, she should not live with you. You will feel even worse if she did. She needs in house help, she is manipulitive in her ways. Find a care and guidance home for her.

I encourage you to keep your foot down

[divine1966]

I am so sorry. I don't have words of wisdom. Parenting is hard

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[Jan1212]

So sorry you are hurting. You know your daughter best you didn't do her wrong don't think that. You tried.

It hurts what drugs can do to a person. Don't let yourself suffer for something that is up to that person and that person only. You can't change her no matter what you do.

It is up to her now. She has want to change herself. You sound like a very caring mother

please DO NOT quote ANY SELECTION of my post. thank you. have a good day.