[blondie1995]

Dealing with my anger hurts and makes me want to run away and never look back. I'm angry at my biological parents for leaving me in a hospital 3 weeks after I was born and didn't come looking for me until I was 12 and all better. I hate them so much I could scream

I want this anger and guilt to stop

[Skeezyks]

Hello blondie1995: I'm so sorry you are struggling with this anger. The Skeezyks too harbors a lot of anger... both over things that were done to me but also with regard to things that weren't done for me... many years ago. Here I am 68 years young & it all still bothers me. Unfortunately, the truth is that having been gored myself when I was young, I turned around & did the same thing to others who deserved infinitely better from me. This stokes my anger (& guilt) as well. It is the sad reality of the human condition I fear.

In my case, it's all water over the dam now. There's no longer anything that can be done about any of it. It simply is what it is. What I have found, in my own life, is that trying to block or stuff down my anger has not worked. It has simply kept coming back over-&-over. So what I strive to do is to simply accept how I feel... with compassion & lovingkindness. When the angry thoughts come up, I breathe into them, smile to them. I may even place my hand over my heart as a sign of my acceptance of what I am feeling. After a few breaths I drop the "storyline" (what I'm remembering that fuels my anger) & simply stay with the underlying emotion until it fades.

Two things result from this practice. One is that, over time, the angry thoughts & memories tend to lessen. But perhaps more importantly one learns that it is possible to stay with difficult thoughts & emotions & not be knocked off balance, so to speak. I wish you well...

[pegasus]

Well, it sounds to me like you have every right to feel angry. It would be a good idea to seek psychotherapy and talk through all your feelings.

[JanusX]

When I'm angry I either scream into a pillow or write scathing emails with endless profanity and insults and don't send them.

[BLUEDOVE]

As you've found,it can be very painful. While not forgiving parents,it is still YOUR responsibility for how YOU feel. It's not
easy,but by taking that responsibility,you take your own power
BACK into your OWN HANDS.
The other point,is, by still being angry,you ADD TO your pain,and thus give them power
over you,you add to the original situation. Something like: "Right,they have done this terrible thing to me and its awful,so
I'm just going to make dear self even MORE miserable than
they did."
Hope that's clear enough,give self a hug and try to let
go,and get on with your life.
Deepest Respect,
BLUEDOVE

[Fuzzybear]

Respectfully,
Fuzzy

Originally Posted by blondie1995

Dealing with my anger hurts and makes me want to run away and never look back. I'm angry at my biological parents for leaving me in a hospital 3 weeks after I was born and didn't come looking for me until I was 12 and all better. I hate them so much I could scream

I want this anger and guilt to stop

Hello, blondie1995,



I think that therapy could be of great benefit to you. I was severely abused by one of my parents which led to me harboring a lot of anger. Therapy helped me let go of that anger and reach acceptance, which immensely improved my life. I encourage you to consider therapy. Additionally, we are here to support you.

Please contact a Community Liasion if you have any questions or concerns.

Sincerely,

Rainy