No more mum

Trying to cope with being estranged from my mother. Feeling alone, almost incomplete.

Hi, vanishingacts. How old are you? I essentially stopped talking to my mother in middle school, I think. I've only had very superficial contact with her since then. I keep everything to myself, or at least away from her.

I basically forgave her everything and I love her very much, but she is nowhere nearly able to cope with much of anything. I find myself having to forgive her all over again, time and time again.

I'm 58 years old. I love her very much, despite everything.

I am 14. I'm in a similar situation. I'm tired of having to tell her how she's stuffed up each time she breaches my trust or something like that. Its like I'm the adult in the relationship

Yes, exactly. Plus, she rarely to never calls me, i always have to call her. She might surprise me this year by calling for my birthday. I'm not sure. There was over a decade that she never called me in the 90s.

It's a shame that female parental units are held in such high esteem and regard by society.

For those of us that were literally vanquished and totally annihilated by ours, it does make recovery rather difficult.

Wishing us all the best as we look for healthy ways to fill the big gaping holes they left in our souls!

She did call, although I think the reason she was she didn't want to have to call tomorrow because she was going for a day to the senior center. I'm so glad she's OK.

Actually, I wish I hadn't posted under this thread title. No blame on vanishing acts , it was my impulse to reply, but since she's so elderly now, it's a nightmare to think of her being no more.

I know how you feel, I was always the grown up in my relationship with my Mother once I hit 12. It is unfair.

You are very wise for your years Vanishing it took me many more years to realise how unhealthy those constant breaches of trust were. I know it hurts, but it will get better