[BlueCrustacean]

This happens often enough that I know it's a major issue for me. I have a big celebrity crush, and whenever this person seems to be depressed or going through a hard time, like a breakup, I get really worried and anxious like I have to save them from themselves or something. And I feel this bad practically ALL the time, as long as they're still unhappy. I can't feel happy until they're happy again, so I'm desperate to see proof that they're doing better. I know it's not productive, but it's very hard for me to stop feeling responsible for a crush's well being, even though there's literally nothing I can do except send a fan message or something. How can I learn to stop being so dependent on someone I've never met, but who I have a very strong emotional connection to? Without feeling selfish or irresponsible in the process? Like if I stop caring so much and try to be more happy with my own life, my guard will be down and they'll do something terrible to themselves and it'll be all my fault... I know it sounds crazy.

I've gone over a little bit of this in the past with my therapist, and I suspect that it may be triggered by when my mom admitted to me that she contemplated suicide during my parent's divorce. She tends to dump a lot of her emotional energy on me that I have to help her carry and make her feel better. I'm so sick of feeling guilty and responsible for things that I don't have to feel responsible for.

[eskielover]

I'm so sick of feeling guilty and responsible for things that I don't have to feel responsible for.

keeping focus on the FACT (not the emotion) that "YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE RESPONSIBLE for anyone but yourself"....& continually tell yourself (& BELIEVE IT) every time you hear that other record playing in your mind.....it will actually reprogram your thinking with time & practice. What you are doing when you do that is reprogramming those old neural pathways you learned when you were young. It works the same was as stroke & Traumatic Brain Injury victims learn to function again. The mind is amazing to be able to do this....you CAN get through & out of this thinking

[Sunflower123]

If you keep doing what eskielover suggests you'll eventually build new neural pathways and the old ones will become less potent due to disuse. Good luck.