Some people (in my life) really don't seem to care, and it is disturbing to me and I feel hurt tonight.

I go through periods and cycles, where I really enjoy being solitary, and then I really need others around. I am just getting out of a short period of enjoying being solitary (about a week, maybe two), and coming back to civilization.

That being said, I really wonder.......if the whole "fill up your own cup before you fill up others" is a really really accurate thing. Especially in my case. I reached out to a friend tonight. She is a friend. And I love her dearly and she is a very nice person. But she is also an incredibly busy person and I would say we are not that close. But I thought she cared about me. She is the facilitator at the meditation group I go to. Anyway....I sent her this message through messenger on Facebook tonight saying that I just wanted to check in and say hello (I haven't been at meditation lately. Been sleeping in the past few weeks). I said I missed her and I hoped she was doing well. Etc etc etc.

She never replied back though she saw the message.

Ahhh! That really hurts. I wish I had more friends. I wish I was a busier person so that I didn't think about **** like this. Though its a natural thing to feel hurt about.

What prompted me to message her was a book I was reading on kindness and "filling up other peoples buckets." ****ing ********. I see that now. People want to treat me like ****. She doesn't need her bucket filled anyways. I do.

Another thing was that I have been in contact with someone from OkCupid. We were planning to get together today but I hadn't heard from him all weekend. I figured he wasn't interested anymore. Then he messages me later today just asking me how my Monday is going, and I can't even read it because my ****ing phone is so old, and he can't muster up the balls to call or something I don't know. What bothers me is that I was understanding about his situation. I saw *some* of his texts. And I said we could meet another day, it's ok. And I haven't heard back from him. That was at like, 5:30 today. Maybe he's a cat fish. Or just not interested anymore. Whatever. I'm not going to message him anything anymore. And if I get one more message from him I can't read. I'm gonna be like "**** it" and just be like, goodbye (already offered to talk on phone or do email). I've told him a million ****ing times that I can't read his texts when he puts emojis in. I know I need a new phone.

Regardless: gonna self care the **** out of my life now. Ttyl.

[Thunder Bow]

Turn off the phone, put it on the charger for the day, and take care of yourself. You need the break.

Originally Posted by Thunder Bow

Turn off the phone, put it on the charger for the day, and take care of yourself. You need the break.

[TishaBuv]

It’s not you, it’s them.

Originally Posted by TishaBuv

It’s not you, it’s them.

Ahhh!!! Such a simple sentence and that makes me feel so good. Thanks Tisha.

I'm doing better today! I really had to vent last night. Thank you for the support guys

[tevelygo]

Originally Posted by starrysky

Some people (in my life) really don't seem to care, and it is disturbing to me and I feel hurt tonight.

I go through periods and cycles, where I really enjoy being solitary, and then I really need others around. I am just getting out of a short period of enjoying being solitary (about a week, maybe two), and coming back to civilization.

That being said, I really wonder.......if the whole "fill up your own cup before you fill up others" is a really really accurate thing. Especially in my case. I reached out to a friend tonight. She is a friend. And I love her dearly and she is a very nice person. But she is also an incredibly busy person and I would say we are not that close. But I thought she cared about me. She is the facilitator at the meditation group I go to. Anyway....I sent her this message through messenger on Facebook tonight saying that I just wanted to check in and say hello (I haven't been at meditation lately. Been sleeping in the past few weeks). I said I missed her and I hoped she was doing well. Etc etc etc.

She never replied back though she saw the message.

Ahhh! That really hurts. I wish I had more friends. I wish I was a busier person so that I didn't think about **** like this. Though its a natural thing to feel hurt about.

What prompted me to message her was a book I was reading on kindness and "filling up other peoples buckets." ****ing ********. I see that now. People want to treat me like ****. She doesn't need her bucket filled anyways. I do.

Did she reply since then?

What bothers me is that I was understanding about his situation.

Don't be understanding until the other person has proven themselves first.

Regardless: gonna self care the **** out of my life now. Ttyl.

Good!