When I was younger I had plenty of slings and arrows. What kept me going was that I felt once i grew up everything would be better. I would be in control of my life, I would have money ... things would be better.

But they aren't. Every day, every SINGLE day, it seems like I wake up and a wave of misery comes at me. And I just want it to stop for five minutes.

For example...
when I was a kid I had to go to school and deal with the different personalities there.

Now I have to go to work, same thing.

when I was a kid I might have a health issue.

But now I have way more health issues and when I have them, I have to go to work, I have sick time but it is a joke. If I am out no one does anything to help.

When I was a kid, I rued that I couldn't take charge when my parents house had an issue and I just had to deal with it.

Now, my own home has issues and not only do I have to deal with it, where I often feel like I have no idea what I am doing, I have to pay for it... which just seems like a waste of money.

When I was a kid, I wanted a pet, I resented that I couldn't have one.

Now I have one, and I can't believe HOW many issues I am constantly tasked with doing for the cat and fear that if my cat gets sick, I won't be able to take time off to car for it..

Sometimes I literally feel like I am my own superhero and every day is a movie as every day there is something I must "endure"...

Why can't I just have like 1 year that is happy and joyous and free from unpleasant tasks and fear.

Anyone feel like this? This is probably normal but sometimes I really wonder... is this life worth it? People who love their lives -- how do they? Surely they have as much if not more as me.

[Deejay14]

One of my gurus said "When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change." It has saved me a lot of heartache.

[BLUEDOVE]

Do look into 'Mindfulness',I promise you it will help.

I have looked into mindfulness. That helps with a stressful situation but not the weary feeling of unending crud coming at you. Just on this point this week I was in bed on Tuesday and we had a thunderstorm. Very unusual at night here. But it woke me up around 2 to 3. There was no warning. The weather forecast said nothing. No big deal but.. at 4:45 AM, out of no place, while I was asleep. BALLMMMMMMMMMM so loud the house shook.

Turned out my neighbor's home (thankfully not mine) got hit. They had a fire. All was ok.

But then I realized my tvs were all not working... they got blown out by the lighting. (tv ok just not the cable boxes) so now I have to spend my weekend getting that fixed.