How do you let go of victim of mentality?

Maintaining healthy boundaries takes two. You lay down your boundary, but the other person has to respect it. When they won’t respect you, that’s when you have to either let them cross your boundary or stop them in their tracks by getting away from them (literally physically leaving or ending the relationship).

There’s pain in ending those relationships. It may be with a person who you thought cares about you. But if they don’t have any respect for you, do it they really care for you? There’s grieving when you enforce your boundary and end the relationship, even when it was an abusive one.

I just found this, since we're talking about healthy boundaries:

What are healthy boundaries?

1. Saying no without guilt
2. Asking for what you want and need
3. Taking care of yourself
4. Doing things out of interest/desire, not out of obligation or to please others
5. Behaving according to your own values and beliefs
6. Feeling safe to express difficult emotions and have disagreements
7. Pursuing your own goals
8. Taking responsibility for your own happiness
9. Not feeling responsible for someone else’s happiness
10. Being in tune with your own feelings
11. Knowing who you are, what you believe, what you like

Yes! When you use those with another person who accepts them, it is a healthy relationship. When you use those with another person who doesn’t, it is the end.

I wonder if one of the reasons why most of Western people struggle so often as to what setting boundaries regards is our Christian cultural background.
I say it with respect for the good part this culture, that is my own one, involves. I do admit that I admire of that idea of loving the others as we love ourselves and all that concept of feeling guilty is needed to be a better person. But, maybe we took it to the extreme and sometimes when we fail or cannot sort of accomplish these principles, the weight of failure and feeling of guiltiness is so hard that we end up feeling kind of selfish if we see us force to set boundaries.

I’m telling this because I often feel bad with myself when I have to make clear my rights or the way I want to be treat. I’m not sure. Feel like if what I sort of have in the ADN is to take in the situation and forgive. It’s kind of what it’s supposed from a good person, right?

Thank you I hope this post help other

I'm happy that I could help you out. I'm trying to remember that whenever I am emotionally abuse.

It is hard.

I will have to keep that in mind.

Thank you for sharing this information wit us about healthy boundaries

That is great advice. I will have to practice that

I never thought about that myself. I supposed that you are right

I feel the same way myself.