[passivezero]

I was going back and forth with posting this in this thread or the divorce/separation thread, as it deals with both... but I guess the emotion is the bigger player, so I'll start here.
I've recently presented my feelings to my husband and let him know I am unhappy with our relationship and he was understandably upset. This hasn't changed my feelings in the aspect of our marriage, however the guilt I've been feeling has been almost overwhelming.
Why should I feel guilty for finally sharing what I've been feeling for more than a year? I don't want to hurt him, but there is going to be pain on both sides. He doesn't want to divorce, but at this point, that's all I can think about.
He wants to "work on it", but he's become suffocating, as if piling on all the husbandly actions is going to somehow change what I've become.
I feel guilty for not telling him that it's bothering me. I don't want to give him hope where there is none.
The therapist we saw told us to "just be" for right now and not try to fix anything at the moment.
Now I feel guilty because I don't think it can be fixed.
GUILT. WHY GUILT?

[bpcyclist]

Uncoupling is a brutally painful emotional experiencec, there is no other way to say it. No way to stop it that I am aware of.

If you have already made up your mind, leave. Don't drag it out. Just go. You can't take care of him anymore, anyway. Yes, it will crush him. This is what happens. Just go already.

Sending you some strength. You can do this.

[Gasplessy]

Hello passivezero,
I think that the important thing is to be kind to both yourself and him, take your time to think about it and evaluate the consequences
It can be hard even after years so it's important to talk to each other as much as needed