[Christmas cookie]

A few months ago I was robbed on a street and pushed to the ground. Many weeks later an injury was not healing and my doctor decided I required a surgeons opinion. My doctor typed a short letter to the surgeon with medical info on my injury and included I have ptsd as a result of the incident. I had surgery, while I was in recovery, I overheard a nurse speaking to my surgeon. The nurse said "She was robbed and attacked?" The surgeon said "I only asked her a few questions. Its affected her mentally."

At the moment I was wide awake and not still drugged up. I admit some of my deciphering skills are not the greatest.

*Does it sound like the surgeon was acting respectful to my situation regarding the discussion with the nurse (described above)? *

Both my consultation and surgery day he seemed normal, pleasant, and not rude. Maybe he decided not to probe too much because it would potentially upset me? Its not a big deal to me if they ask questions or decide to not say anything.

The reason for asking this is due to many bad experiences with doctors. Rude, judging etc. So I automatically think the worst.

[Have Hope]

It seems the surgeon was being just matter of fact, and not insulting or rude. Rude would have been "I can't believe she is affected mentally by this".

[Christmas cookie]

Thanks Have Hope Matter of fact sounds correct. Agree with example you mentioned regarding rudeness

[MsLady]

"I only asked her a few questions.." to me sounds like he didn't want to discuss this with her further. PTSD is "affecting you mentally". He was being factual without getting into a gossipy session with her.

I don't think he was being intentionally rude. He could have said you now "suffer from PTSD," rather than say you were affected "mentally".. but I don't think he meant any harm by it.. IMO

[Christmas cookie]

MsLady, thank you for responding. He may have chose to give basic info to protect my privacy. Im guessing my medical report contains basic info; cause of the injury. Nurses working with me would see it. Maybe said affected mentally instead of ptsd for privacy too. She may have not seen that report; difficult to say.

[Bill3]

He sounds respectful to me. I would guess that as a surgeon, not a mental health professional, he would not want to use terms of art or involve himself in an area out of his professional expertise.

[TishaBuv]

It sounds like the surgeon was dictating it to the nurse, who was making a note of it in your chart. The term PTSD may have also been included and they were adding brief details to the notes. They’d be very brief to explain basics in surgery notes.

[seesaw]

Originally Posted by Christmas cookie

A few months ago I was robbed on a street and pushed to the ground. Many weeks later an injury was not healing and my doctor decided I required a surgeons opinion. My doctor typed a short letter to the surgeon with medical info on my injury and included I have ptsd as a result of the incident. I had surgery, while I was in recovery, I overheard a nurse speaking to my surgeon. The nurse said "She was robbed and attacked?" The surgeon said "I only asked her a few questions. Its affected her mentally."

At the moment I was wide awake and not still drugged up. I admit some of my deciphering skills are not the greatest.

*Does it sound like the surgeon was acting respectful to my situation regarding the discussion with the nurse (described above)? *

Both my consultation and surgery day he seemed normal, pleasant, and not rude. Maybe he decided not to probe too much because it would potentially upset me? Its not a big deal to me if they ask questions or decide to not say anything.

The reason for asking this is due to many bad experiences with doctors. Rude, judging etc. So I automatically think the worst.

It's not the best phrasing, but I don't think he was intending to upset you. You know you have PTSD, and maybe he was too tired to remember the right Dx you had after the robbery. And maybe he was saying "I only asked a few questions..." because he didn't want to upset you or trigger you or retraumatize you? I don't think it was meant to be disrespectful to you as a patient.

Hugs.

[Christmas cookie]

Seesaw,

When I think back he never asked me questions about the incident at my consult. He may have thought he asked. They see so many patients he may have forgot or assumed he did. Its okay with me. True his phrasing may have been off or he was tired.

[seesaw]

Originally Posted by Christmas cookie

Seesaw,


When I think back he never asked me questions about the incident at my consult. He may have thought he asked. They see so many patients he may have forgot or assumed he did. Its okay with me. True his phrasing may have been off or he was tired.

He may not have asked those questions because he didnt want to trigger flashbacks by making you talk about it. And also, he may be uncomfortable providing emotional support, since he is a surgeon and not trained as much in therapeutic communication, he may have felt it best to avoid the topic because HE doesnt know how to respond.

Here's a different question: did you feel disrespected? Its more about how you felt than what he meant.

[Christmas cookie]

Originally Posted by seesaw

He may not have asked those questions because he didnt want to trigger flashbacks by making you talk about it. And also, he may be uncomfortable providing emotional support, since he is a surgeon and not trained as much in therapeutic communication, he may have felt it best to avoid the topic because HE doesnt know how to respond.

Here's a different question: did you feel disrespected? Its more about how you felt than what he meant.

Thanks seesaw. I didn't feel disrespected. I guess the way he phrased the sentence was a little off but I'm sure all of us have blundered words.
True their role is to repair people and not counsel. He may not know what to say or respond

.I had surgeon that was very disrespectful with other past trauma. Traumatic incident causing injuries which required surgery. He mocked, laughed and made insensitive remarks at every single appointment and in pre op. I don't expect empathy. Even if you don't understand or never experienced trauma act respectful to the patient.
I think it's rude to make fun of or insensitive remarks.

I stopped seeing the rude surgeon and switched to the one I posted in this topic. Unfortunately the rude insensitive one assisted in my recent surgery. I see him soon for a follow up ( insensitive one) because the other one will be away.

[seesaw]

Yuck, I'm sorry you have to see the old surgeon again. I encourage you to tell him to stop mocking you if he starts up.

[Christmas cookie]

Originally Posted by seesaw

Yuck, I'm sorry you have to see the old surgeon again. I encourage you to tell him to stop mocking you if he starts up.

I hope i have courage to speak up if it occurs. Or if he starts up I will change the subject back to my operation- ask a question. I'm always afraid if I speak up, even in a polite direct manner, they will label me as a bad patient, complainer etc in my chart. Yet they shouldnt get away with insensitive remarks, mocking a patients trauma.

Originally Posted by Christmas cookie

I hope i have courage to speak up if it occurs. Or if he starts up I will change the subject back to my operation- ask a question. I'm always afraid if I speak up, even in a polite direct manner, they will label me as a bad patient, complainer etc in my chart. Yet they shouldnt get away with insensitive remarks, mocking a patients trauma.

[LilyMop]

I’m sorry you went through all this. It sounds like the surgeon was just focusing on the facts and not the actual emotions. The health care environment really isn’t very caring... they just get the job done and move on. I hope you’re feeling better.

[Christmas cookie]

True he was focusing on the facts. Maybe protecting my privacy in front of the OR staff.