[Aviza]

I know I ruined my life, I long to be married but at the same time cannot handle marriage. I've ruined my life and had to live with that forever. I'm currently feeling like my apt though nice is it.

I'm unlikely to move or afford to move. maybe I'll change furnishings in 10 years but overall I have nice stuff. I am on a waitlist for section 8 may move if that ever comes up. But I'm in my ideal location and a nice apt.

i have a job, which i may be sabotaging as we speak. I lost my temper with a client last week. pressures got to me and she made me later than I wanted to be and told her.

I feel like everything is good but it's all the same, never going to change, etc.. i know ultimately things change but status quo is depressing to me. Things with work are currently changing getting clients removed and new ones added. But that's mostly my doing. status quo got to me pushed for change.

How do you deal with status quo? Things are good but I guess I'm used to drama and can't live without it.

[divine1966]

Is there something new you could introduce into your life that’s not same same old but isn’t drama fueled? Like a hobby? Something totally new. Craft? Art? You like music so maybe music related? Walking group? Yoga? Book club? Try meetup you find some people tk dk occasional things with?

[Aviza]

That's what my therapist suggested. I want to add exercise, but I don't do it. I like reading but rarely finish a book. I like to paint but have no use for it and I'm not good. I recently printed off a bunch of pictures have to put them in a photo album. That's something I'll actually do and reading may try that.

If you like to paint, don't worry about whether you're "good at it" or not. Practice is how you get better at it. I say if you enjoy it, do it

It takes a lot for me to finish a book too. You're not alone in that. I still like to read too though!

The status quo can get boring! I totally agree. Hang in there