Adhd, Faking it until I make it

In reality that I don't really deserve to be holding my jobs. My office job and store job.

I know a lot of people who have my issues probably wouldn't be holding my jobs or any job.

I lived most of my life trying to fake it until I make it.

I did poorly in school and I still struggle with learning and attention issues.

But I still try to do an honest job so I have to work harder than others for the same or lesser results.

I'm frustrated that everything takes me more work than others. And when I see someone who had no patience at all, I feel bad for myself because I feel so worthless but then I am grateful to be working than not...

...but I feel depressed about myself that it takes me longer and more efforts just to make it ....

I wonder if there really is any help for someone like me with adhd, ocd, etc...

I'm tired of working so hard but I don't want to give up working because I need the financial stability.

I'm sorry that you have to work harder than others especially since you are burdened with the illnesses you mentioned. It really isn't fair. Its heartbreaking actually.

That you do this, though, is actually something very heroic. People like you who hold a light against the darkness, inspire me.

On the other hand, if you are overwhelmed, you deserve relief. Does Canada offer disability payments to people who have afflictions like yours?

I wish I knew what to say to help, but not living in Canada, I don't know what kinds of services are available there.

I've been told that the difference between sadness and depression is that sadness does not involve a loss of the sense of self-worth, while depression does.

I see you as a very heroic person, which is one of the highest and noblest things a human being can be, so I hope your difficulties, as crushingly heavy as they are, do not cause you to have low self-esteem.

You are deserving of respect and praise for the efforts you make in your life.

Sorry I do not know how to be helpful to you. Hopefully others here will have more helpful words than my poor words.

I appreciate the comment yaowen.

I can't go on disability unless I was poor and didn't work much or at all but disability cheques does not pay much to live on.

I am grateful for my jobs because they provide more financial stability for me