Reached My Limit

I can't work in pharmacy anymore, I just can't... it feels like torture. It's beome cruel and unusual punishment and I can't anymore. I've applied and applied and applied for a wide variety of positions-- mortuary driver, warehouse, art store, Denver Public Library... and I have not heard back from any of them. And I can't just quit because I have bills to pay. I don't have anyone supporting me or anything like that, not that I would want someone to do that. However, in this situation, it makes things more difficult. It is what it is, but I am getting major headaches and bouts of depression just thinking about going into work tomorrow. I am at a loss and don't know what to do. Oh if I could just give my two weeks' notice and magically find a job within that time frame. But I can't.

It’s stressful. I hear of people quitting jobs and I could never figure out how they do it. Could you talk to recruiters of any kind? Sometimes it’s the way. Maybe they can find something?

Could you take sick leave?

Hey divine— I have talked to a few recruiters, but the only ones who seem to be interested in me are recruiting for pharmacy positions. No dice.

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Hi Discombobulated— I probably could call in sick, but I feel that would be like treating a symptom and not the root cause. It would be just a quick fix. Eventually, I’d have to go back.

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Yes that’s true, I wouldn’t normally recommend sick leave but if you’re at mental breaking point sometimes it can give you breathing space, you know best though! Good luck.

I worked as a computer programmer for 30 years. Back then it was described as the job next stressful to being a dentist, which has the highest unaliving rate.

For most of my working years, i worked as a contractor so i could take a month or two or three between assignments, which lasted up to 3 years. I would know it was time to go back to work when my bath time went down from 6 hours back to 1 or 2 hours!

I guess im saying, do you need some time off? Yours is a very exacting profession, and coworkers can be morons.

Update: I didn’t go in today. I went out to get an iced coffee— I have coffee at home, but I was afraid that, if I stayed home, I wouldn’t want to leave and go to work. So I went to the Starbucks in the local Target and promptly had a panic attack about going to work. I was sobbing and gripping my hair and chewing on my plastic cup and shaking violently. I knew right then and there that work was a no-go today. That’s just how it was. Went home and got a phone interview scheduled for 2pm today with a different job. Also applied to two other jobs.

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It really sounds like you could be at the edge of your coping ability, that’s good you took a break. Take good care of yourself.

i did do, in later years, some odd jobs during my breaks. Like stand-up comedy, and polling. I was in NYC, standing in the rain outside a comedy club during the day, hoping to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get onstage. Then a pretty boy asked me if i wrote my own jokes and that just blew my mind. Now i wonder if that was a trick question? Anyway i finally decided i would prefer a warm dry office. At least i had the sense to have an umbrella.

Just saying - other jobs are pretty horrendous. What are the pros and cons of yours? You have a lot of autonomy in your actual work, dont you? Even if it is driven by requests.

Regarding autonomy— not really. We have to adhere to policies and laws and the pharmacist has to check everything we do. Also, there are certain things and questions that we are not permitted to do or answer because they are beyond the scope of tech work — even if i know exactly what the pharmacist would say when counseling a patient about a drug they are taking, I cannot say it. Furthermore, I’m sorry, but i don’t want to work in pharmacy anymore. I’m done. I hate the field and have done it long enough.

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