[bananasarecool]

i feel disgusting.
i feel like i cant even go outside because i look so bad.
ive got huge shoulders. MAN shoulders. and i look so FAT. im so ugly. i have a huge nose and tiny pigish eyes and bloody stupid frizzy curls and a huge chin.
im so deformed.
im revolting.
its a wonder anyone can actually like me.
im so ugly.
im so fat.
im so manly.
im so revolting.
and im so stupid for caring.
im going to be like this forever. i doubt it can ever change. and ive got no willpower. i look awful in everything.
why cant i just be pretty?
why cant i just be thin?
why cant i just be perfect?

[LittleMouse]

Originally Posted by bananasarecool

i feel disgusting.
i feel like i cant even go outside because i look so bad.
ive got huge shoulders. MAN shoulders. and i look so FAT. im so ugly. i have a huge nose and tiny pigish eyes and bloody stupid frizzy curls and a huge chin.
im so deformed.
im revolting.
its a wonder anyone can actually like me.
im so ugly.
im so fat.
im so manly.
im so revolting.
and im so stupid for caring.
im going to be like this forever. i doubt it can ever change. and ive got no willpower. i look awful in everything.
why cant i just be pretty?
why cant i just be thin?
why cant i just be perfect?

I'm so sorry that you feel so horrible about how you look. I can understand how you feel because sometimes I feel fat and ugly too. Just remember that there are those who love you no matter how you may look. If you are depressed this will lower you self-esteem and distort your perception of yourself. Hope you feel better soon!

[turquoisesea]

I'm not going to lie, I've been there too with the body image.

One thing I wanted to say is about feeling "fat". It took my boyfriend constantly explaining and reminding certain things to me for me to start believing, for real, that I'm not fat. In actuality if you look at ideal weight for your age you might be surprised. Dunno. But for me... it was specifically about my tummy - but my boyfriend liked the curves that WERE there, and also I got worst about it at certain time of month - the problem wasn't fatness it was bloating.
Maybe your boyfriend could explain what he likes about the way you look - more than anyone ... he obviously is attracted to you so even if you can't see it he can.

Also it might help to look at an ideal weight calculator - don't cheat yourself and look only at the lowest number. Has your doctor every said anything about it?

Frilly curls - some people like curls

I guess what I'm saying, is all the things you describe is subjective. Depression lies to all of us. Even about what we think are facts.

Obviously I don't have a picture of you so I can't know what you look like. I don't know what you weigh I don't know the body porpotions. However from what I've heard you write, from what I know about you I somehow doubt that you are as ugly as you say.

sending hugs

[littleyellowspider]

I'm really sorry to hear you are feeling this way, these are feelings I've experienced often too and they are never fun. I am sure that you judge yourself more harshly than the rest of the world. And remember that looks are not everything, I have a sister who is absolutely gorgeous, she is tall and thin and often gets asked if she's a model. However she has been depressed lately saying that she feels like people only ever judge her on her looks, and no one is ever interested in her personality or getting to know her, She feels like she has nothing going for her other than the fact that she is so pretty. So it goes both ways, awesome talented people think if they were prettier they would be happier and very beautiful people think if they had something else they would be happier. And NO ONE is perfect I'm sure you don't know anyone who is.
Also I just wanted to say that I have VERY frizzy curly hair, like really, it's ridiculous looking, and have hated it my whole life, however I often have people who come up to me and say they love it because it is "cool" and "unique" and they have asked how I get my hair to look like that and say they wish they had hair like that. Probably other people feel the same way about your hair! Just remember that how you see yourself and how the rest of the world sees you are very different. I hope that you can start to see the beauty in yourself. Feel free to PM me if you ever want to. Best wishes.