[justfloating]

I just need to vent for a second:

My brother is a conceited, arrogant, obnoxious *****!!! He's 16 and doesn't ever know what he's talking about (or even have the capacity to make a rational argument about ANYTHING) and I normally don't take anything he says seriously. He has a TERRIBLE sense of self-importance, and if people don't act/say/think whatever he wants them to, they are clearly idiots and can't do anything right and are a waste of oxygen.

I know he's an idiot. I know he's 16 and running his mouth off comes with the territory. I don't know if he realizes how hurtful he can be (even when what he says is stupid/illogical/has no evidence to back it up/is based entirely on his skewed 16 year-old view of the world) or if he even cares, and it never used to bother me too much (beyond annoyance, of course) whenever he started running his mouth. But tonight at dinner, he attacked my academic pursuits and career goals and told me that anyone who doesn't go into science (I have always been on the language/literature/history track) is wasting their time and money getting an education because what good are we to the rest of the world, and how are we ever going to make a difference? I KNOW none of that is true. I've worked VERY hard to get where I am and I'm proud of my accomplishments and I wouldn't change a single thing about the way I live my life -- not to mention, I've heard this particular speech before. But for some reason tonight it really got to me. I now feel TERRIBLE, not because I believe him, just because hearing you're worthless spoken out loud (whether you believe it or not) is still incredibly painful, especially when you're depressed. My brother doesn't know about my depression and would never understand it, nor is he compassionate enough to deal with it (he doesn't have a compassionate bone in his body!).

I've been really, really upset and hurt by his words. But good luck trying to tell him that -- he'd just laugh and tell me I'm weak. When did I start letting the spew that comes out of his mouth affect me? I'm angry with myself because I know it shouldn't matter and I know I'm a bigger person than my brother, but I'm letting it upset me anyway.

[Miracle1986]

Rebecca

[Junerain]

((((justfloating)))

I'll look for your work in bookstores, _I believe in you, literature is great especially when you write so well. You could have a lot of cheap comeback lines, but I think you're above that! We believe in you here at PC more of a humane set of minds than your brother's

[Fuzzybear]

((((((((((((((((( justfloating ))))))))))))))))))

[shezbut]

((((Rebecca))))

No fun at all . Your brother's selfish insensitivity will pass ~ hopefully very soon!

Shez

[idontknow13]

((((((justfloating)))))
I am sorry your brother has hurt you.
I read your blog a couple of nights ago and I found you to be a very good writer and mostly a very wise, insightful person young person.
You are also a very kind person.
You should be proud of yourself, I would be happy to have someone like you in my life.