[lynn09]

Just wanted to say a big "Thank You" to everyone at PC for allowing me to join the family. I have been fighting the biggest battle of my life for the past 8 years, maybe even the biggest battle for my life, all on my own and getting oh so weary. I was almost to the point of giving up until I came here. Sometimes when I'm just too beat up to fight for myself anymore, standing with and fighting for others who are battling for their lives is the only thing that can get me back on my feet. Also knowing that others are standing with me gives me the courage and strength to fight on - life is just too precious to allow anything or anyone to steal it from us.

[Pomegranate]

Thank you Lynn. I feel the same way you do. Knowing people are here for me that understand and have gone through what I am going through brings great peace of mind to me. And getting feedback from others here that let me know I've helped them in some small way also helps me immensely and helps me feel my life is worth living. Thank you for expressing this so well.

[depressedalaskan]

Originally Posted by lynn09

Just wanted to say a big "Thank You" to everyone at PC for allowing me to join the family. I have been fighting the biggest battle of my life for the past 8 years, maybe even the biggest battle for my life, all on my own and getting oh so weary. I was almost to the point of giving up until I came here. Sometimes when I'm just too beat up to fight for myself anymore, standing with and fighting for others who are battling for their lives is the only thing that can get me back on my feet. Also knowing that others are standing with me gives me the courage and strength to fight on - life is just too precious to allow anything or anyone to steal it from us.

Me too - Welcome to PC, you said it, we are a good family. Hugs for your day.

[*freak*]

I don't know you, but I wish you good luck with your battle... and I promise we'll be here when you need us

Take care

[Fuzzybear]

Thanks so much for posting this, you said it so well!
Thinking of you,
furry paws

[darkpurplesecrets]

((((lynn09))))

Wecome and I am glad you are here. I hear what you are saying. This is a wonderful place--a family that some have never had. A place where your words whether little or much is important. A place where you are heard for you and you matter.

So many times, I come here and read others words. So many friends, and so much caring. So many times, what others say gets me through and carries me to another minute, another hour, another day. A word, a sentence, a hug, can mean more than anyone ever knows.

I am sorry you are going through so much pain. Know that we are here for you when you are ready to talk. And we are here even if all you can do is say nothing. We are listening and you are not alone. Thank you for sharing what you did.

I send you many gentle hugs and loving thoughts. I look forward to getting to know you. And I will be here for you as best I can. I do care.

dps

[lynn09]

Hi! Just saw the notice on my post about no "S" posts. Let me clarify, please - NOT talking about that - NOT an option. I have an immune-system disorder, but can't get medical treatment. Have always been family's designated "scapegoat." I became disabled in 1999; had 3 major allergic reactions that year that almost did me in and had to stop working; have survived multiple other Stevens-Johnson Syndrome level reactions over prior 20+ years. Never close with family members, but my brother sweet-talked me for two years to get me to move back to hometown in Texas so he could "help" me. Should have known not to trust him/them. I have been completely isolated and ostracized from the moment I arrived - 8+ years now. Brother, sister, mother convinced everyone here that I was a "pathological liar, a "demented, delusional lunatic," a "neurotic hypochondriac," a "clever psychotic," and a "criminal" (claim I "tricked" the SSA into awarding me disability). They contacted my doctors here (and my T, now EX-T) without my knowledge or consent and told them the same thing before anyone had a chance to get my medical records from up north. Internist's staff did not even request medical records until 2006 and tried to blame me for their incompetence. As a result, I lost more than $80,000 in long-term disability insurance benefits to which I was and still am legally entitled, about $500/month which would have allowed me to afford the Medicare co-pays and receive the treatment I need. Can't use county hospital; too far away, no transportation, not eligible to use Handitran. Once the doctors found out that they had been deceived and manipulated into betraying their ethics and my trust, and violating my rights (HIPAA regs, etc.), they were more concerned about protecting their reputations and careers than my life. I can only get medical treatment now on an emergency basis through the hospital ER, and even there I am treated like a lunatic and criminal. Even though I have a Medicare Advantage plan now, I am "blacklisted" among the doctors in this area. I have continued the treatment regimen established by my doctors up north (400-500mg Benadryl, 300mg Ranitidine every day, avoid heat and light, etc.) to suppress my immune system (in place of Prednisone). I have had no help from anyone with anything. Forget APS, too; caseworker really messed things up, then covered up her misconduct at my expense. Case too "complicated" for Legal Aid and involves a state agency. I can't get out and meet people because of the heat and light intolerance. Since no one had a name yet for my immune-system disorder, my disability was started on "Major Depression Disorder" because that is one of the major neurological "symptoms" of my reactions (increased cerebro-spinal fluid puts pressure on the brain), plus seizures, mini-strokes, etc., complicated by predisposition to depression from long-term physical, emotional, and psychological childhood abuse (no child protection during 1950s and 1960s), chronic pain (some from physical inuries as a result of that abuse), and other chronic medical conditions. I worked for 32 years inspite of these conditions before being forced into disability by them. SSA has been waiting for someone to give my IS disorder a name so they can assign it a code so they can change my SSD primary diagnosis. Brother didn't want that to ever happen because he wanted everyone to believe I'm "crazy" so he could get control of my 1/3 share of the inheritance in our mother's will (you would think we were the Rockefellers!) which he finally did in 2007. Had to get me away from doctors up north so IS disorder could not be diagnosed and treated. Brother has completely controlled how I am portrayed to and perceived by everyone for his personal financial gain and to feed his need for Power, Dominance, and Control. His words, "You're nothing. You're nobody. You don't have any rights."

I AM FIGHTING FOR MY RIGHT TO DEFINE MY OWN IDENTITY, MY RIGHT TO CONTROL MY OWN DESTINY, MY RIGHT TO LIVE, MY RIGHT TO EXIST, MY RIGHT TO BE TREATED LIKE A HUMAN BEING, AND MY RIGHT TO RECEIVE THE MEDICAL TREATMENT I NEED! THIS IS THE BATTLE FOR MY LIFE THAT I AM TALKING ABOUT. I DON'T CARE HOW SICK OR LOW I GET, I DON'T CARE IF I HAVE TO CRAWL THE REST OF THE WAY THROUGH MY DEPRESSIONS, PAIN, MIGRAINES, RASHES, INTERNAL BLEEDING, AND EVERYTHING ELSE, I WILL NOT STOP UNTIL I HAVE WON MY RIGHTS!

[depressedalaskan]

Sorry long post or any long reading I can not do. Not sure why but I get the gitters or something. I did read a little though and all I can say is keep up the fight. Good luck.

[Seabirdanne]

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

Thanks so much for posting this, you said it so well!
Thinking of you,
furry paws

Fuzzy Bear, I love your Hula Bear.

[turquoisesea]

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((lynn)))))))))))))))))))