i dont know why i feel depressed at the moment. this is depressing

[sanityseeker]

Well said. That's how I feel too. Like being sick and tired of being sick and tired. Really makes it tough.

I think I am beginning to get that its not about why but rather its about what and how. What do I do now to keep it from getting worse? How do I cope. How do I manage my way through this. How do I empower myself to keep on keepin on without giving in to the negative feelings. What little thing can I do this minute and the next minute and the next..... sometimes minute by minute just to keep my head looking up and forward. How do I love myself through this so that I don't loose hope.

Sometimes the best I can do is accept that I am depressed and arm myself to counter the effects as best I can giving myself kudos and affirmations along the way until I can see some light again.

Wishing you well perfectsilence as you keep on keepin on even as the mystery of it all remains somewhat illusive. Ours is not to reason why, ours is just to do and try.

Blessings.

[Rohag]

*sits down to share being depressed with Perfectsilence*

[sanityseeker]

Rohag.... can you help me understand something. I value your wisdom because I have read, been inspired and been uplifted by posts of yours around the forum so I ask with respectful intention.

'Share being depressed'..... is that not in some way feeding the depression? Is it not suppose to be our intention to fight the depression? To bring forth the arsonal of coping skills to decrease the debilitating effects of the depression?

It is interesting to me because I have just in the last few days cycled out of a 4+ month depression (no control of my emotions, high anxiety, no energy, hopelessness etc) into a more manic like phase. I haven't slept for a couple of nights, my energy is high and my mind is racing. I have no symptoms of depression right now. What is interesting to me is that I find when I am out of the depression I have a hard time relating or recounting the feelings of being depressed. It is like I have no personal understanding of how it feels to be depressed when I am not depressed. Not sure if that makes sense to anyone else but I have become accutely aware of it the last few cycles. Even when a cycle of depression goes on for months at a time once it breaks its like I have amnesia about it or something.

I am thinking that if I were depressed right now then sharing for the sake of the companionship of someone feeling the same way would be comforting to me. Is that what you mean? Since I am not depressed at the moment then what goes through my mind instead is the importance of fighting off the negative thinking and other triggers that magnify the effects of the depression. Because I am not depressed at the moment the logic of 'doing' over rides my thinking.

Like I said I have clearly moving into a manic state (for how long who know) so I may not be making much sense. It is just that your response raised the question for me and now I'm wondering how to process it. I know that when I am depressed I put a lot of pressure on myself to reject and resist and battle up and now I wonder if I have it wrong. I don't think the coping skills I employ when I am depressed triggers any break from the depression but I think they ease the struggle or at least help to keep me from falling too far into the pit so that I can partially function.

Thoughts?

[sanityseeker]

Sorry perfectsilence I don't mean to hyjack your thread with my query. If you would prefer I delete or move my post please let me know and I will gladly do so.

Wishing you well.

[lonegael]

((((((perfect silence)))))) perfectly understandable. Hang in there. HUggs.

[FeelingHopeful]

Ps And Sanity Seeker I am sending big hugs to both of you. ive been depressed lately so i want to aend my love and hugs to others.

[Fuzzybear]

(((((((((((((((( perfectsilence )))))))))))))))))