[shaggy dog]

My shoulders sag under the weight of this newest episode. It has been about 3 weeks ago that it started. I know that is a short time compared to some of the other posters, but it seems like an eternity nonetheless. I want to crawl out from under this rock that crushes me, squeeze out from between these walls that are closing in. But all I can seem to do is wallow. With all the ills going on in the world all I can do is think about me and my problems. Right now my blessings are curses. I'm irritable to the family I love. I resent waking up to go to the great job I have. My faith is in shambles. But who ever promised me it would be easy? What am I going to do about this? I'm going to my farmhouse this weekend for a short time respite. For a longer term solution I'm seeing my psychiatrist in 2 weeks and I will ask for a med evaluation. I'm going to hunker down and battle, wage the war because I'm a fighter. I've been suffering from depression since I was in middle school 40 years ago, so what is yet another episode other than something to conquer. Put another trophy on the wall because I'm going to beat this one also. I'm stubborn and defiant. I'm a fighter and a survivor. I will control it, it will not control me and I will get thru this. shaggy

[garden gal]

Shaggy Dog,
I'm so sorry that you are going through this. Is there any way that you could get an appointment with your psychiatrist sooner? Two weeks until your appointment, plus however long it would take for new meds to kick in, seems like too long to feel that miserable. Have you put a call in to the office to let them know how bad you are feeling?
I like your fighting spirit and your determination to get through this. We're here for you. Keep posting and let us know how you're doing.

garden gal

[sadden]

(shaggy)
This battle sounds soooo exhausting. Do you see a T?

[SophiaG]

I dont know what you believe in, but maybe this would be a good time to focus on your faith to give you some solace. Stay strong until your next psych appointment. *hug*

[concern1970]

Keep strong Shaggy.... 40 years is a long time, with a bit of support from family and friends I think you've learn't to adjust to your Depression and work with the tools that you have.

[feddy]

((((Shaggy dog)))))

Do not compare yourself to anyone, 3 weeks of suffering is already too long. 40 years of suffering, even off and on, if far too long! My journey is at 10 years and I understand what it means to feel like a fighter and a survivor, looking at episodes and feeling like you have to conquer time and time again. Don't look to the end, look to tomorrow and do the things you need to do to feel a bit better today.

I am so sorry that you are once again feeling blue but you know like I know that in time, you will survive this one again too.

Feddy