[soonforgotten]

Hi everyone, sigh* I'm not to sure what i'm to say in these chat rooms...It's my first time so bear with me. Today it just dawned on me my depression started when i was 7 years old so I've been depressed for 17 years,but i've only come to realise my feelings after the birth of my daughter 7 years ago.You see when i was 7 I used to go home with a lady whose granddaughter went to the same school until my mother came to pick me up one evening i decided to go home with another girl who lived closer to my home to make a long story short my mother called the police and i was beaten unmercifully by my father.I hate my father ( last year he tried to kill me) and as usual my mother just stood by his side and blamed me, but now I know why she never put him out it's because he gives her money every month. I don't love my mother anymore either.I hardly go out as i am ashamed of myself and don't want my daughter's father to see me.I can't get a job that's also depressing me.....I never had any 'real' friends at school or out ......it seems everyone was down on me 'cause of my mother she always used to go and complain to the teachers about me so i left school without any certificates.Then I stupidly got pregnant and I'm here regretting the fact that I should've gotten an abortion when i had the chance. I know i'm all across the board with my problems.Can anyone help me please!!!! so many things from my past are haunting me.

[CedarS]

First I suggest getting into therapy, are you? I suggest going to a therapist and also if possible joining a support group. A group for women, or mothers, or survivors of violence, anything along those lines.

Therapy can help you sort out challenges, problem solve, get feedback, and begin the healing process.

Talk with someone also about how you are feeling as a mother, that sounds important. Call in any healthy support you can find, check round what social services are available to you. If you need respite, see if there is any group offering child care to parents who need a break.

Your depression might slowly fade through work in therapy, you also might want to try a course of meds, see if that helps.

Best wishes to you,
Sarah

i agree with sarahl...try to find resources that can help you, particularly with the parenting. i don't know what state you live in, but most states have human resource offices that know where you can find support groups and aid for your expenses and such. and if you can find a support group, that would be helpful for you.....best of luck, pat
p.s. keep posting here. there are tons of good and supportive people on this site.

[Hope4me2]