[lemonzest]

I've made a couple of new friends recently (past 3-6 months) - a couple of really nice guys who've know each other a long time. We arranged and have been out walking and scrambling in the mountains a couple of times and are planning more trips - these are things I love to do and I really enjoy the fact that we're doing this. I want to explain to them that I am sometimes preoccupied with my own thoughts, situation, problems, etc and that I don't want to e-mail much (hardly at all) or to e-mail back straight away - I don't like wasting time on the internet which is why I don't post that prolifically anywhere about anything. It must seem rude, forgetful or inconsiderate sometimes but often I just don't feel ready to reply or to be more chatty or upbeat than I really feel - I like to be left along for long periods of time without feeling like I need to "keep in touch" - I want to be able to say this without getting myself excluded from this newly formed friendship group - I'm just not sure how to say or explain this to them. Your thoughts?

[Rhiannonsmoon]

Being one who bangs rocks together, I would explain that I am avoidant as far as the internet is concerned (I don't like email or chat), as well as being insular and avoidant IRL unless it comes to doing things I really enjoy (such as banging rocks together, I collect them and the most amazing worlds live within them), the occasional shopping day, beach walking etc

Just be open and honest, maintain a sense of humour and surely they will accept you for you? I hope. That is what we all hope for

[sane1logic1]

If you also add that you appreciate the opportunity for roaming the mountaintops with them, and maybe make a small effort to keep up with them meantime, I would hope they would accept that. Perhaps they find common ground with you when sharing ideas for the forthcoming trips?

I know that in some circles there is a tendency not to accept people who aren't as oriented towards certain kinds of technology. As to these two, I hope their love of sharing the open air with their fellows is stronger than any of that. I also hope their existing long term friendship doesn't get in the way of opening up to extra members surrounding the walks.

Maybe while you are on a walk they will occasionally share conversation on a topic that you can join in on.