[Overcastbutclearing]

Yeah, back to life.
I woke up this morning feeling angry and totally hating myself.
I despise who I am.
I feel afraid, lonely, sad, angry.
I hate who I am.
I am worthless. Useless. Ugly. Worn out and over used!
I have a lot of destructive energy building up inside of me today.
I just woke up already feeling this way.
That is what blows about all of this...it comes from nowhere and sits deep within me.
I am becoming more selective about who I talk to these days and what I say as well.
Hate...me, myself and I!

[Fuzzybear]

((((((((((((((((Susan)))))))))))))))))))

bsb

Hi Sj0401,
Wow, you are having a REALLY funked out day. Sometimes I wake up feeling that way when I've had a bad dream and it puts me in a downward spiral for the rest of the day.
It sounds like whomever you've talked to and whatever you've said had something to do with this because of end of your post.
I've had situations like that. Mostly with my family.
You'll bounce back. That's what I love about being human. You have that ability to consciencely change and everyday, there of, stands the oppurtunity to make things better for yourself. So, today you may hate your past actions or response to someone else's actions but you learn from them and hopefully not have to repeat the same thing over again in the future.
My therapist told me that insanity is nothing more then repeating the same behavior over and over again but expecting a different outcome.
I hope this helps a little. I think you could give yourself a break. You need to give yourself a candlelit bubble bath with soothing music and let all the negative energy soak out of you. Pamper yourself instead of beating yourself up.
Hope you feel better soon!!! ((((((SJ0401)))))))

[wi_fighter]

(((((((Susan)))))))))

[Overcastbutclearing]

I should probably call my T but I feel like she needs a break from me.
I have decided as well to take a break from here.
I guess I need space.
Sorry to leave on such short notice.

Was it something I said?