[Kiersten.michaela]

My problem is that I dont know what's wrong. I am sad all the time, easily stressed. I used to cut. I have a terrible self-esteem, I cannot accept compliments at all and everything I do is bad. I used to LOVE writing and singing and acting but now I just suck at all of them. When I'm around family, when they're all loving and happy, I start feeling uncomfortable. Example: I had an early Christmas and I got great gifts but I had to force myself to be happy and I was hoping they'd leave soon, and I NEVER see them. Whenever someone likes me, I almost feel obligated to like them back, even when I'm already dating someone. Which sounds terrible. It's like I don't even know Who I really like. I have a hard time depicting what I am really feeling from I don't know, what I think I Have to feel or am obligated to feel. I can't make decisions at all. I've been trying to stay single so I could try to clear my head so I wouldn't get confused about my feelings and emotions but it doesn't work. I'm scared of being alone. I have an overactive imagination which in a way, tortures me with ideas that I can't stand. That fits in with the whole not knowing what I am really feeling. I don't know what's wrong with me and I really need help.

[Omers]

Welcome to PC. There is a lot of help and support to be found here. It sounds like having a therapist to talk this over with might help you to better be able to sort it out.

[Rohag]

Hello & Welcome, Kiersten.Michaela!

Originally Posted by Kiersten.michaela

I don't know what's wrong with me and I really need help.

Even if you knew what was wrong with you -- and it could be depression or depression+other illness or something else entirely, you are correct: you would still need help. You might find reserves of strength within yourself to assist you. If so, I would be glad for you. In my case, depression either robbed me of the strength to help myself or cut off access to that strength.

Stick around, compare notes, post what you're feeling. Participating in forums like these is a positive step.

Welcome to the Community, Kiersten.michaela. I hope you find the help you need.

[Leed]

Hi Kiersten ~ It sounds to me like you're suffering from Anxiety and Depression at the same time. I've been where you are, and it's miserable. I'd talk to my doctor and tell him exactly what you told us, even if you have to write it down. He would probably prescribe an antidepressant, even if it's just temporary for a few months. You will feel so much better, believe me!!

I take an A/D now and I've never felt better in my life. I can focus now, I can "feel" and now I can do the things I used to love doing! So please talk to your doctor. God bless and take care. Hugs, Lee