[WearilyConfused]

So... I'm in love with someone who lives far away, and my emotions have steadily been doing a downward spiral for about half that time. I started out just missing him, but I've graduated to generalized depression and anxiety that occupy my mind all the time. I'm guessing that the long-distance relationship is the cause, but I can't even figure out my own emotions anymore. I'd appreciate any ideas on how to cope...

[Yoda]

Is this person somebody that you knew in person and then they left like going away to college or has this always been long distance? How often do you see him?

[whenwillitend]

I don't know what kind of long distance relationship it is, but here's my experience: When I met my husband in my home country, Germany, he was in the military, stationed there. We dated for three months, and then he went back to the US. For the next four months we had a long distance relationship, lots of letters and phonecalls. And then we got married (yeah, I know, it was soon) and after five more months of long distance relationship, I moved to the US too. I don't know where your relationship is going, if you're working towards marriage or moving together or something else, but it's very doable, at least temporarily.

Good luck!

[craZgirl]

how ofte do u see him?

[WearilyConfused]

I see him about once a month, for a weekend or sometimes longer. And yes, we're moving towards marriage... it's just hard to be patient.

[turquoisesea]

It's impossible to know what's best for you. I know if I was in a long distance relationship I'd go crazy. I had to do that over the summer... twice and depression spiked etc.

If I were you I'd want some hard dates - a decision to move in by xxxxx. That might make the waiting more bearable for me. I don't know if this is possible for you or would help you, but it's an idea.

Also maybe find some friends in real life, or activities you can do away from home that distract you from your loneliness.

Take care, and keep posting here if it helps

[whenwillitend]

Originally Posted by WearilyConfused

I see him about once a month, for a weekend or sometimes longer. And yes, we're moving towards marriage... it's just hard to be patient.

It sounds like you guys got a plan. As a military wife, I know how hard it is when you're not able to see your guy, or even talk to him whenever you feel like it. Heck, every deployment is a one year long distance relationship. It takes patience, but it is very possible. As long as you guys know what you want, I don't see why it couldn't work.

[sarek]

I know how you feel. It can be real tough. My own long distance gf is not that far away, just a hop across the Channel.
But her very bad mental health condition often creates a huge gap between us. There has been very little communication possible for months now.

I do agree, a very important part in keeping the relationship alive is to make sure you have a future you want to aim for.