[DAICY]

It's been strange over the past week. I've been feeling hopless, empty, irritable, and apathetic, then suddenly i felt nothing. aboslutely nothing. It was as if something snapped within me, preventing me from feeling anything. Some extreame form of apathy, maybe ? I now don't care if my grades fall, or my future would be like, andcare about others and my own wellbeing. That's really starting to freak me out, because i never felt so...numb? Another thing that is starting to bother me is that, I can't clearly recall all the recent and past upsetting memories. I tried remebering, but every time i pulled at a certain memroy, it would just pull away from my slip. It's as if my mind doesn't want me to remember. What's going on?

[Rohag]

Hello, DAICY!

Originally Posted by DAICY

It's been strange over the past week. I've been feeling hopless...then suddenly i felt nothing. ... It was as if something snapped within me, preventing me from feeling anything. ... What's going on?

Speculation: Your mind is protecting itself from itself, much the same as a person in extreme pain passes out.

My personal experience of depression is marked by persistent apathy. Part of it is probably medication-induced, but perhaps much of the apathy is a kind of psychological defense against painful thoughts and despair.

I don't know if this is the truth, and, if it is, I don't know whether it is ultimately good or bad. Maybe the apathy keeps me from a worse darkness, but it certainly has undermined my ability to function normally.

I hope others here will offer you different perspectives.

[DAICY]

Originally Posted by Rohag

Hello, DAICY!
Speculation: Your mind is protecting itself from itself, much the same as a person in extreme pain passes out.

My personal experience of depression is marked by persistent apathy. Part of it is probably medication-induced, but perhaps much of the apathy is a kind of psychological defense against painful thoughts and despair.

I don't know if this is the truth, and, if it is, I don't know whether it is ultimately good or bad. Maybe the apathy keeps me from a worse darkness, but it certainly has undermined my ability to function normally.

I hope others here will offer you different perspectives.

What should I do? I feel so empty and see life aboslute pointless without any motivation or passion. I feel as if i am not needed and i don't contribute anything good to the people--to the world....I feel like a waste of space...

[s1030]

I am sorry that you are feeling this way. I am trying to cope with my depression also. You are not a waste of space. you are just as important and special as anyone else and deserve to live your life happy. Now I just need to tell myself this also. Somewhere deep inside of me I believe that I will get through this. It may take a while but there has to be a light at the end of this tunnel for the both of us

[Rohag]

Originally Posted by DAICY

I feel so empty and see life aboslute pointless without any motivation or passion. I feel as if i am not needed and i don't contribute anything good to the people--to the world....I feel like a waste of space...

DAICY, this and your initial post speak "depression" to me, but I cannot diagnose. Additionally, you are not yet a legal adult and, ironically, your mother the nurse is hostile to your receiving a mental health diagnosis and medications (did I read that correctly?). All these limit your options -- limit, not eliminate.

Do what you can do, and try not to bother about what you can't. Is there anyone at your school to whom you can freely reveal the information you've posted here?

[DAICY]

Originally Posted by Rohag

DAICY, this and your initial post speak "depression" to me, but I cannot diagnose. Additionally, you are not yet a legal adult and, ironically, your mother the nurse is hostile to your receiving a mental health diagnosis and medications (did I read that correctly?). All these limit your options -- limit, not eliminate.

Do what you can do, and try not to bother about what you can't. Is there anyone at your school to whom you can freely reveal the information you've posted here?

I was thinking of going to the school psychiatrist, but the fear of being labeled a teen looking for attention is making me very hesitant. I really don't want to trouble people with my problems, and that it self makes it hard for me to open up, even in this site; my initial post might have been the most difficult thing to type, much less post, as I debated whether my problems were even worth the trouble...
I'm sorry.

[SophiaG]

oh, but that's what psychiatrists are for! To help you with your struggles. You wouldnt be bothering them.

[DAICY]

Originally Posted by SophiaG

oh, but that's what psychiatrists are for! To help you with your struggles. You wouldnt be bothering them.

Yes, i know that, but I can't stop worrying about...never mind.
You know what, I think I'm going to try and visit the psychiatrist next week, that'll be my goal for now... I just hope i won't get cold feet.

Good luck with seeing the psychiatrist, DAICY. We are rooting for you.

I feel the exact same thing I understand you. I went to the school councillor and it honestly helps it really does. and I no it will help you too.

[DAICY]

Originally Posted by Jess95

I feel the exact same thing I understand you. I went to the school councillor and it honestly helps it really does. and I no it will help you too.

Thank you Jess