im really struggling but i dont feel like i can talk to anyone. mum and dad constantly are worrying so i dont want to make it worse. im home alone now and came on here to distract myself from doing anything i'll regret. ive just spent the last half an hour hunting the house for where mum hides all the paracetamol and stuff (boy, is she good at hiding things!) but now i've given up i cant find anything! i just dont no what to do i dont feel right i dont feel right at all. i feel all worked up and cant keep still and feel like i need to do something big, but i just dont no what. im scared i dont no whats wrong with me. i feel like i need to cry but i cant, i feel like i need to scream and run but i cant, i just sit here completely motionless i.ve been sat here all day i cant feel my legs for pins and needles but i dont care. i just feel like i need to do something, i dont no what to do! i cant make mum and dad come home, i cant keep ruining everything for them its not fair AGHH i dont no whats wrong with me what do i do!?

Sometimes, Jess, the most important thing is to take care of yourself. Telling your parents about how you feel and getting the help you need seems to be the best decision you can make now.

Can you call them and explain what is going on? I bet they would want to know.

[Rohag]

Originally Posted by Jess95

i dont no whats wrong with me what do i do!?

Only a professional (or team of professionals) can properly sort out what's "wrong". Right now, however, you are highly agitated, therefore...

Originally Posted by TheByzantine

...the most important thing is to take care of yourself. ...

Byzantine has offered you suggestions. Don't be afraid to call for help.

Samaritans.org - UK & Republic of Ireland
World-Wide Suicide & Crisis Hotlines
Suicide Prevention, Awareness, and Support
Lynn P.’s Concise List of Crisis Advice

i cant ask for help, i cant. its not fair on my family is it. thankyou for your help, but last time i got bad dad said "sometimes you've just got to suck it up and deal with it". well if thats his opinion i have to try and do that for a while longer. :/

[Can't Stop Crying]

Have you tried to explain to your dad how much distress you're in and that you're trying but you just can't "suck it up" Sometimes parents don't always have the right answers, maybe he is struggling with how to help you and that is the only way he knows how.
Rohag gave some good numbers to try...maybe that's a good place to start.

I know as a parent I don't always know the right thing to say, maybe give your parents another try?

[Miss Laura]

Hey Jess,

Try the samaritians..... email, phone, go in and see them. If it wasn't for their help when I was like you last year I wouldn't be here today..... They listen and don't judge and offer sound advice.... obviously they don't tell you what to do though

Your folks are just beginning their journey with you on your Depression. They need you to speak up when things are maybe upsetting you/making you angry or annoyed etc... from what I have read in your emails your Parents however unhelpful at times are trying to be there for you

Hope your ok!!!

[Rohag]

Hello again, Jess95! Looking back at my reply to you, I see I violated one of my own principles. I said,

Originally Posted by Rohag

Don't be afraid...

I'm sorry. If you're anxious about something, you're anxious, and you don't need me commanding you to turn off an emotion. I know, or should know, something about the depth and persistence of feelings.

You know your own situation with all its complications. Sift what you read here accordingly. Our desire is that you live, grow, and flourish in happiness.

[Leed]

Hi Jess ~ How are you doing? Are you feeling any better at all? Do you still feel unsettled? if you feel like screaming, go ahead and do it! I would scream in my pillow and kick my feet on my bed! That used to help me alot. At least if I screamed in the pillow the cops didn't get called. LOL It helped me to release a lot of tension & anxiety.

I agree you should call your parents if you still feel badly. We as parents don't know all the answers. Kids didn't come with a manual unfortunately. Give them a call. And we'll still be here. God bless. Hugs, Lee

[lxegirl]

Don't feel like a burden to your parents!! They love you! When you feel alone and trapped, try and find a friend that can be there with you, i'm sure somebody would be happy to help you calm down when you're like this. Best of luck.