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#1
May 06, 2011, 11:38 AM
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hello all,
been a while since i've been on here.. from my last post i had broken up with my fiance, didnt know if i would get hired on with a full time job. well here's an update. i actually got the job and got the health insurance and benefits... my birthday just passed it was yesterday and i feel like crap for it. i've never felt this alone in my life. i often ask am i that boring,am i a loser, what? there is a history of depression within my immediate family and noone has sought help but i want to im tired of feeling worthless and hearing what others have to say about me (negatively) i go through enough coming from a jacked up family. my own dad knew that my bday was yesterday and in his exact words he says " so its your birthday,whats the big deal i'm turning 75 soon,make it there and we'll have something to talk about" what type parent says that. i need some type of outlet i need a dr, i call around to clinics here in ga and im being told my insurance should cover me seeing some type of therapists.. but my insurance says it doesnt. i try to contact the state or local county places and they say nothing is wrong with me to just go talk to a pastor at a church. i'm very frustrated and hurting. i just turned 30 and i feel alone and like the biggest freakin loser. i try to make friends,i try to find hobbies to occupy my time. like i love motorcycles i just got my license and i just want to buy a bike and ride. and find someone who wants to get a bike and ride with me. i just want a real friend be it black or white..yellow or green just someone who actually cares. i go to different dealerships i my area and they say well son your credit is crappy so no bike.. i look on craigslist and noone takes me serious. as if my money is no good. i have a young lady who is interested in me but has a stupid jealous supposedly grown man that has a woman at home bad mouthing me to her.. a man calling another man a loser,nerd, and all other things.. he calls me out for being in the military saying i feel as though im a big bad man.. i never claimed to be but this guy has singled me out but doesnt say it to me just to the young lady. im catching hell from all sides..i just want to make friends..and ride a bike and feel free. and get help for how bad im feeling and i cant find anyone and why is this so hard. my problems have me feeling worthless i cant do anything right.. my own parents dont like me.. im tired of this feeling and want help |
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#2
May 06, 2011, 11:55 AM
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 I don't have any words of wisdom. I'm sorry you're going through so much. I know how much depression sucks and how much it sucks to come from a dysfunctional family. I wish that I had something brilliant to say, but the only thing I can come up with is that you're not alone feeling like this.
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 tymewilltell11
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#3
May 06, 2011, 12:03 PM
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Quote:
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.
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