[agma]

I need some advice on how to handle stress at work. I have worked for this company for almost two years. About 5 months ago I was promoted to an Assistant Supervisor, so I went from working in kids homes and communities to working in the office. I enjoy what I do (although I do miss the kids), I like the people that I work with, and it is nice that since I was promoted, I now work normal business hours. The problem is that things are ALWAYS changing, and I am not necessarily talking small changes. Since I have been in the office, we have lost our service manager and gotten a new one, one of the supervisors got laid off for budget reasons, one supervisor is on maternity leave, my supervision has changed to the service manager (I am actually kind of happy about this one), and one of the other assistants just quit (which means more work for everyone since they aren't going to replace her right away). There are more, but it would take me forever to go into everything. Beside all of the changes, I am having a hard time keeping up with all of my job duties. I realize that July and April are my two worst months, but still. I've try talking to people that I work with, and they are supportive and offer to help me with different tasks. The problems are, I don't feel better after venting to them (I lie and say yes when they ask if I feel better after talking), and I HATE having someone else do my work. There are a couple of reasons, the first being that it is my work, so I should do it....they have there own work to do, they don't need to be doing mine as well. The second is that I have extremely high expectations for myself, and they might not do something as well as I would have. Now, 3 of the 4 people I work with are looking for a new job. Two of them are seriously looking and have had some interviews. I am nervous what is going to happen when they leave, especially if they all leave around the same time. I am worried about who they would replace them with since they would probably have to do it quickly as there wouldn't be enough of us left to handle the work load. Unfortunately, I feel very stuck because I am to new in a supervisory position (this is my first one) to be able to go somewhere else. The only way I could leave is if I took a pay cut, and even then, I HATE the interview process, waiting to find out, and then the though of having to start somewhere new scares me to death.....new people, new expectations, new job duties, etc. I feel like my only option is to learn how to deal with all of the stress and change. How do other people deal with stress and change at work?

[Leed]

Hi ~ First you have to realize that MOST of these "stressors" haven't even happened yet. You're just projecting what MIGHT happen in the future. And you can't "live" in the future cause it's not here yet. We aren't even guaranteed a future --- you have to live in today!!! Today is all that matters. If we all projected what MIGHT happen tomorrow, we'd all hang ourselves! LOL

Secondly, you're in a supervisory position -- so why is it wrong to delegate duties? So what if you need help with your duties?? If the others in your office have the time to help you, what's the big deal? And if you think they can't perform these duties as well as you, then I guess you'll have to do it all. LOL But first make sure that you KNOW they can't perform as well as you. Don't judge them without any proof.

You can still have high expectations of yourself, but make sure they're reasonable. If you're a perfectionist, you must realize that NO ONE is perfect. No one can do everything -- and that asking for help doesn't mean that you're not capable. It just means you have too much to do!!

You need to go easier on yourself. You'll have a nervous breakdown if you don't ease up. God bless & take care. Hugs, Lee