[lonelyandsuicidal]

Every site/forum I go into, I ask what the meaning of life is and not only does no one seem to know, but apparently I'm a freak for asking the question and I'm a freak for wanting to know the answer.

Every single thing I do, think, and say is wrong. I am not allowed to express a thought or emotion, and my inability to live my life only for the physical and only for 'surface tension' is a great annoyance to others.

Love is never ever ever supposed to have anything at all to do with sex. Ever. And it's supposed to be everywhere--TV, books, movies, billboards, at work, at home, EVERYWHERE, and if I'd just get that through my thick head, not only would I be a happy person, but I'd be having really hot sex all the time with lots and lots of people...and animals...and furniture. Geez, I'm wasting it. I get asked out by married men and to be 'a third.' Not ever by anyone who likes me or gives a **** about me. Get laid and get off. That's all I'm here for, and I can't even do that right.

There's nothing at all wrong with drugs and getting high. I'm wasting my life by not getting high and stoned and ripped. I'm just an asshole for not using drugs. I don't use drugs and I don't sleep around, and this makes people run screaming from my life. It means there's something wrong with me. Normal people get drunk and get high. I don't. I'm not normal. This makes me a worthless human being, except to people who go around saying no one is worthless. Problem is, if no one is worthless, then it's just stickball and everyone qualifies so it means absolutely nothing and I'm right back where I started--that I'm worthless.

I do not have 1,500 people on my facebook page that I do not know, don't keep up with, don't interact with on any meaningful level, and haven't ever met. I like to only keep family on there and actual friends on there. That also means I'm worthless.

The only thing a monkey needs in order to be happy is a banana and another monkey. How long does it take to get bored with that? If you're a monkey, most species live around 30 years. By the time you get bored with a meaningless existence, totally consumed with feeding physical needs and nothing else, you're ready to die.

Problem is, humans generally live 60 to 80 years. What do you do with all that extra time? Go nuts?

I need love, affection, someone to care for, someone to care for me, and to be allowed to express thoughts and emotions. That makes me an asshole. Just wanting that, needing that, expecting that--that makes me a complete asshole.

So I come back to 'why am I here?' Well, because two people had sex. You have sex one time, and sentence another human being to 60 - 80 years of absolute emptiness and nothingness. Eat, sleep, ****, get laid, get drunk, get high, party, party, party, and work a job. Love has nothing to do with sex or family. Work a job and shut the fk up.

I work a job so that I can have a place to live so that I can sleep and eat so that I can work a job so that I can have a place to live so that I can sleep and eat so that I can work a job

Endless, self-perpetuating circle that serves no purpose outside its own sphere. If I'm not here, I'm not incurring debts and expenses. Absolutely nothing and no one hinges on me getting up in the morning.

I'm here because of the urge to perpetuate the species. Um...

So I do what a lot of other empty, stifled people do--I sit on the computer going from one imaginary place to another imaginary place expressing myself in little boxes. I'm trying to fool my brain into thinking this is actual interaction.

I'm lying, of course.

So what is the meaning of life?? If there's a person inside there somewhere, don't you kinda need one of those?

[Omers]

Hi,
I too have not (voluntarily) had sex, done drugs or hell even smoked a cigarette. I went to a bar once in college, had 1/2 a drink and went back to class.
I enjoyed reading the philosophies/beliefs in your post although I don't agree with the conclusions (your being worthless) that you have drawn.
I am going to take the liberty to change up your question a bit (I'm just arrogant like that, nothing personal). Anyway... changing it to "what is the meaning of MY life" as I think the answer is different for everyone.
I do believe a lot of people have become complacent and live only the life you talk of in your post. I am not currently able to work (don't worry... no sob story ahead) so work can't be the meaning of my life. I have a special needs child I adopted who takes the majority of my time and energy and provides significant mental stimulus... I don't however believe it is fair to ask a 12yr old to provide meaning to my life. I have pets, no meaning there... mostly a can opener. I have hobbies but am often not well enough to enjoy them.
So... being the pain in the a* philosopher that I am it leaves me with questions...

1. Is the meaning of life something that comes from within us or from outside of us
2. What truly is "meaningful" in a reality where everything/ every one has a time then it passes... often into a mostly forgotten void.
3. What is the importance of meaning.

Then, the whole love thing... well personally I don't think love and meaning are connected... and, with my ramblings that would be a whole new thread... but I am happy to go there with you as well if you'd like.

No, I am not being a smart a*... just an arrogant philosopher... though there may not be much difference.

[Leed]

Hi ~ I have to kind of agree that the morals of our society have gone to the dogs. I too believe that you need LOVE in sex -- there's no way I could just bed down with someone recreationally. No thanks!!! Plus I'm bored to death with people who don't even consider someone else's opinion or slant on things. I think that people who use drugs/alcohol to "have fun" are addicts/alcoholics and they're going to come crashing down some day -- I don't want to be part of that anymore -- I'm a recovering alcoholic and I found out that THAT is deadly, and I had alot of personal defects to correct when I quit drinking.

I wasn't put on this earth to impress others, so I also don't have thousands of "friends" on facebook. If we don't 'talk' you're getting deleted.

I had to find out what my purpose in life was -- and it's not easy to figure that out !! But with patience & honesty, I figured it out. I'm supposed to help & support others. I'm disabled, and I found that I can offer suggestions and understanding to other disabled folks. That gives me satisfaction -- perhaps I'm just selfish and want to feel better about myself -- who knows?

I may be a Pollyanna, but I think there are still others "out there" with the same needs & wants as we have. I don't think the whole world is tainted with these loose morals. This country is in a phase, and they're going to hit a brick wall one of these days.

Just my opinion. God bless & take care. Hugs, Lee

[lonelyandsuicidal]

It is impossible to hug on the internet. Where do I go for a real one?

[TerryL]

Originally Posted by lonelyandsuicidal

It is impossible to hug on the internet. Where do I go for a real one?

Well I think there has to be some kind of relationship for a hug to be meaningful. If you don't have that kind of friendship yet, maybe start with small steps. I try to remind myself that there are people I encounter daily who are going through struggles of their own. They might not be apparent. Many people are lonely too. So even a small gesture like a smile, a kind word or a helping hand can boost their day, which in turn should help you feel better.

As for the meaning of life, I guess the ultimate goal is to have a happy life. Not always an easy task. Try to do what you love to do, if not as a job, then just anything, whether it is reading, music etc. and I really believe helping others will help you in return. Wishing you much peace and happiness dear--Terry

[SophiaG]

I used to think about the meaning of life, but when my depression lifted a bit I stopped thinking about it so much.

I agree most people are shallow or maybe it's due to an inability to connect to other people?

[Shadow-world]

Fortunately there are many many people who appreciate other things than merely drinking, random sex, drugs and superficial interaction with others. They are there even if you might not see them right now.
I tend to associate with such like-minded people and these interactions are meaningful to me.

On the larger topic of the meaning of life, I have thought a lot about this and I believe that at the end of the day, the most important thing is that we LIVE our lives and experience them. By that I mean, experiencing happiness, sadness, fear, longing and other emotions as well as thoughts by being in the present moment and alert.
Yes, happiness is one part of it, but only one part. The search for meaning is a part of it, but that can already be found in living life to the full at least to an extent.
Sorry if I'm rambling on... I'm just trying to formulate my own thoughts. I think asking the question about the meaning of life makes you truly human.

I don't feel I can contribute much to the love theme, as I struggle with this myself, but I hope the above has helped to give you a different perspective even if you don't agree.