Hard time coping

Hi
I am the mother of an 11 month old baby girl. I love her to pieces. The only reason that I smile, laugh or play is because of her. Recently though I feel like all of the laughter and smiling is dwindling little by little and I am afraid of what is happening to me. I have been depressed before and I am scared of being depressed and alone with her. I dont want her to miss out on something because I am so depressed I cant get off the couch or I am crying so badly that it upsets her. I already can not cry in front of her because she gets hysterical which make me feel worse. I was in a relationship with her father but it recently ended and now she and I are living alone. He doesnt help with the day to day stuff at all and its so hard. I understansd that its my responsibility but I need his help. Its so hard. Even when we lived together he didnt do much. When I decided to have her I had the conversation with him about helping and our responsiblities and to me it seemed like it would work. Well it hasn't and now im so overwhelmed that I think that I am falling back into depression. I dont have a family that will help. I dont know my own father and my mom isn't one of those concerned moms. She may help but she makes you feel like crap first because you cant do it or someone else isnt helping. I just dont know what to do. Im fading. Even at this moment I am so sad that I cant focus or do what is important. My job is suffering and I think that I may get fired if I dont do something. I think I need therapy but I dont have time between working and being a mom. Daycare only lasts for so long. I dont want to be a bad mother. My mom was never there for me when I was growing up and I want to break that cycle. I want my daughter to know that I love her and that I will always be there for her. But in this state I cant be my best.

Most t's don't mind if you bring your child. They should understand that you can not afford to pay day care anymore money.

You need to take care of you before you can really care for the little one. The baby's daddy should step up and take the baby every other weekend to give you a break. You should ask him to do that for you and the baby.

Hang in there it will get better.

Do you have any mums groups that you can go to? Maybe contact with other mums will help. Also, try to take some time out for yourself - listen to music, read, have a bath, go for a walk.

It is really hard taking care of children. Really draining and all-consuming. I find it helpful to think about how I really want to be there for my children and watch them grow up. They need me, as does your little girl. That gives you a purpose and a reason to go on.