Bitten by the Black Dog

I am so low......
We found and rescued a little Top Notch Pigeon yesterday that was hit by a car, he was in a bad way. We went to several vets, most were closed and the last said he couldn't do anything...finally we went to a wildlife emergency centre a will away....at first they thought he was a hopeless case but then the vet had a better look and promised to do her best....

It was my last straw, I burst into tears on the way home and I have been fighting such a dark depression since....I was holding it all together, fighting really hard throughout the holidays and now I am exhausted, lonely, lost.....I know it's my depression but that rotten black dog really has a good hold right around my neck, I am struggling to breath...

I try so hard to be really positive but when I fall it hits me hard

It's just a pigeon, this post is hard to comprehend. It was a good deed you helped a pigeon but this post is hardly understandable, just stay positive and about the dog thing, you've confused me there.

It's not just a Pigeon, it's a living creature but that wasn't the point......I posted because I was so upset...I was hoping for a little bit of kindness because I could really do with it at the moment.....

The Black Dog is a term we use "In Australia" to refer to Depression.....

"just stay Positive" or "Don't worry about it" or "Get Over It"......I just feel even more down......I didn't come here to have my writing criticized, I came here because I thought I could become friends with people who understand what it means to live with BPD, and/or Depression and the roller coaster ride of emotions

Hi, WobblyWombat.

You did the best you could to help the pigeon, and it was really thoughtful of you. That is one very fortunate bird.

Sometimes in the midst of all the stresses, it takes only one more stressor to overwhelm somebody and tip them over the edge. With the holiday season almost over, I do hope your stress will lessen and your depression will ease up soon.

Oh sweet one

You should be very proud of yourself, for it is not "just a pigeon" to me. To me it is a living, breathing creature with feelings, and emotions and fear and joy and all of that. And if nothing else, you provided that creature with a modicum of care for the last of its life. Do not despair though - birds can be surprisingly hardy sometimes. Have you heard from the vet yet?

So nice to hear someone go the extra mile for an innocent animal...of course, when we open ourselves up and care so selflessly, we can be more easily affected....your sadness means that you care deeply...what a lucky pigeon...some people have no one who cares as much as you have. Maybe don't fight the tears so much...they can be cleansing and provide a healthy release.

Dear Fharraige, MandiePoo, lido78,
Thank you all so much for your kind words..

Fharraige "Sometimes in the midst of all the stresses, it takes only one more stressor to overwhelm somebody and tip them over the edge. ..."
The little pigeon's pain was my final "tip over the edge"...I have rescued many animals in the past, but this time I was emotionally vulnerable.

MandiePoo, "Do not despair though - birds can be surprisingly hardy sometimes. Have you heard from the vet yet? "
Your right but I haven't had the heart to call the Wildlife Group yet, mainly because it lets me imagine that the little bird is doing well. I will call when I am feeling a little stronger....

Lido78, "Maybe don't fight the tears so much...they can be cleansing and provide a healthy release."
You are also right, I had a big cry after reading the recent replies and I do feel a lot better for it.

Thanks again, it really means a lot to me, to have others understand my sadness....

I think you're a kind person to help this injured pigeon and I know its stressful seeing another living being injured. What you did is a wonderful thing and hope you know we need more compassionate people like you in this world.

I was confused at 1st about the "bitten black dog" - I thought you suffered a dog bite. I can understand how this one stressful event could have this affect - its like the 'last straw that broke the camels back'. Even if the pigeon doesn't make it, at least this bird felt your comfort. You did a good deed and I hope knowing this, will make you feel better. There have been adults collapsed from heart attacks on New York City sidewalks and pedestrians step over them in annoyance......you ((WobblyWombat)) are better than those people.

howdy mate!..

it's another Aussie here.

I know the 'black dog'....
some-one should stop feeding the damn thing..let IT die...keep all the little pigeons alive....

there's somethin' about caring for helpless and injured creatures wobblywombat....and yeh as others have said...it can be significant enough to let the black dog inside the house..

I know of "the black dog" too. In fact there is The Black Dog Institute here in Australia which has numerous resources for those suffering depression and other mental illnesses.

I'm sure Dapsych meant no real harm. Some things people do are hard for others to understand.

I very much relate how one little thing can put you over the edge. Most of us have probably been there a time or two. Keep posting, you're in the right place.

I don't have much to add, It was a wonderful thing you did though. I am in the USA and for some reason I understood the black dog thing without a problem maybe because I have dealt with it too most of my life. Take care. I am sending hugs your way!

Thank you all so very much.....
It is so nice to hear from so many kind and understanding people...

You have all lightned my heart....

I am so grateful

Hi WobblyWombat,

I think you did a good thing helping that pigeon. Not a lot of people would have bothered so you should be proud of yourself for going out of your way to help an injured creature. You did everything you could so keep that in mind if the pigeon doesn't survive. I really hope it does though.

Also I'm from the UK and am familiar with the concept of 'the Black Dog'. Apparently Winston Churchill (UK prime minister during WW2) popularised the expression by comparing his depression to a black dog. I read a book about it, which may help explain the analogy for those who haven't heard of it before.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Had-Black-Do.../dp/1845295897

*Willow*

I think it is peoples ability to really empathise that drives them to help others, even animals. I also think that the ability to empathise comes from our own life experiences, as we may have felt similar degrees of pain /emotion.

So there is the double edged sword - on the plus side, the motivation to help others who are suffering, but the flip side is that we may have developed this "skill" due to our own internal struggles - and maybe you just can't have one without the other.

My T even said to me that those who feel so deeply are moved to relieve others suffering, as by doing so it also relieves their own pain that is generated by witnessing the suffering of others - he said that is one factor that motivates people into becoming T's.

Not sure what I am trying to say, other than remembering a crow that I stopped to help once - everyone else drove past him as he lay there helpless.

I am sorry that witnessing that pigeon has triggered more intense feelings for you, life is not perfect for anyone, animals included, but don't forget that it was a good thing you did.

(((((wobblywombat)))))

Yes, I understand how you're feeling, how just about anything could tip you over the edge. That darn dog likes to lurk and jump out on you.

My daughter rescued a tiny baby fieldmouse from our cat this summer. We looked after him as best as we could, got advice on how and what to feed him, made him a cosy bed and just when we thought he was going to be ok...... well anyway, he didn't make it. I was distraught, more upset than the kids and it pushed me over the edge into deeper depression at the time.

I hope the darkness lightens a bit for you soon and you can shoo the dog away again.