[dexter]

past few days have been nasty. still sleep problems and so far the new med keeps me awake with nausea i'll giv eit a few days to see if it subsides

meantime still big headache and tired and unmotivated. i missed support group tonight just didn't have the energy. still aggravated by the job stuff too can't just let it go. why can't i just drop it?

just getting through the past few days has been really hard. nothing special going on the depression just seems to be a bit darker than usual.

i started reading Joseph Campbell's "Hero with a Thousand Faces" and in just the first few pages I'm pretty wrapped up emotionally. This has always been atuned to my personal "philosophy of life" and reading it all laid out is both hopeful and sad... hopeful because I think i still really believe this stuff but sad because most of me thinks i'm past the point of ever being able to regain the feeling that i'm on the journey.

i'm kind of stuck between metaphor and reality and wondering if where i am now is a part of my journey or if i have truly lost the path (which is how i feel) but if it is my journey how deep is it going to go? am i going to loose my house and everything before my transformation? Because i don't think i have the strength to take that path.

-- The world is what we make of it --
-- Dave
-- <A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.idexter.com>http://www.idexter.com</A>

[heatherm]

{{{{{{{{{Dexter}}}}}}}}}

Give the Celexa a few days to adjust to your system. I know it took myself about a week or so to start to feel different. I was nauseated at first too and now I make sure I eat something when I take it. Even some toast or something light. Another thing I noticed with it is that I take it about 10 pm or a bit after.....by 11pm, I am very sleepy.

I did notice that the med did help with my thoughts.....makes everything more clear. Give yourself a few more days and then see what decisions you can do then. Just some time is needed. I know how hard it is to say that and believe it but I do think that is what you need.

We are all here for you.


Heather

[dexter]

I took it a little earlier last night... still didn't sleep but pattern was different. Instead of lying in bed awake I fell asleep pretty fast but then woke 3 hours later with insomnia.

I had the bad nausea with the zoloft so I'll be OK riding the wave until it subsides. And it seems like taking an hour before bed is my best bet maybe I can get things back to normal.

Thanks

-- The world is what we make of it --
-- Dave
-- <A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.idexter.com>http://www.idexter.com</A>

[dexter]

saw therapist today, he is in tune with my pdoc. i always feel better after a visit, but it always fades afterward because i still don't feel any progress is being made.

i'm still just scared and frustrated.

i think i'm getting into a better schedule with him though so i should be able to see him every week. 1 houur is so short though especially coming out of the iop program

-- The world is what we make of it --
-- Dave
-- <A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.idexter.com>http://www.idexter.com</A>

[krzyk101]

I hope that you get to felling better, and am glad to hear that your Therapist and Doc are working together with you.

I understand the short lived feeling that comes after therapy, I saw mine today and felt much better now a few hours later I am back to my normal feelings of depression, but I guess I do have something to look to , our next session. I just feel like there is always something tearing me apart. It can be awful, constantly upset and just feeling terrorized by my own thoughts. The pDoc said that i suffered from a type of depression called Atypical depression, I haven't reasearched this much but plan to. My T told me it basicaly is like a complex and diffrent type of depression, hard to treat.

Hope you are having a good day [smile}

KRIS

"I'm Not Crazy I'm Just a Little Unwell"

If you think you have totally gave up, you haven't, because you are here!

[SeptemberMorn]

You're on your journey, Dex. As long as you keep trying to do something for yourself, you're working on it. Sometimes, either we need a break or things seem to be at a standstill. Just give yourself permission to be where you are. Let it be okay for the time being. Before you know it, a bright new dawn will break.

<font color=blue>"The winds of change continue rolling and they just carry me away."</font color=blue>