[mel95]

I'm new here, and I just want to know if anyone feels the same way, or if they know what's wrong with me. I'm almost seventeen, and half the time I don't feel like the world is really their. I'm always hugging my friends, or playing with their hair, or doing some sort of physical contact with them so I know that yes, they exist. At school I have to sit around people I know, other wise I start to stress that they could hurt me. I worry when I hear whispers that I did something embarrassing and people are making fun of me. I worry that my friends don't actually like me, and yes I stress. I can't go to bed without telling my parents I love them, even when we are fighting, just in case something happens and I don't get to see them again. When I'm driving with people, and we go a different way to the store, I worry that I'm just going to be dropped off and left! I've thought about killing myself, but I'm terrified to do of. I can't concentrate on anything, and my grades have gone down. What's wrong with me?

[BuggsBunny]

It sounds like you could use someone to talk to. Does your school have a counselor you can see?

[Rohag]

Hello & Welcome, Mel95! When stuff like this starts messing with your daily life, as it is with yours, then it's time to talk to someone. I hope you can find a counselor who will really listen to what you have to say -- or read what you've written -- and not dismiss you due to your youth.

Please keep posting.

[CgRgSm]

Hi, and welcome here. I don't want make you feel worse, so if you have to, just disregard what I'm about to say. I don't believe that the world exists, or that anyone else does. For me, physical contact (or any other human sense) is not enough to prove that anyone exists or is "real". Now, I believe you are beginning to become skeptical, or paranoid. Like others have said, you should probably go to talk to somebody about how you're feeling. Sorry I don't know if I have contributed anything...just trying to help and relate. I don't think I'm that great of a person but I'll always listen to what you have to say.

[dazeofdolphins]

Find a professional and be completely honest with your feelings. Acknowledge that you have profound anxiety that can get better with talk and meds. Don't worry too much about your grades as too much pressure is already put on teens to get great grades. Grades go down and they come up - accept the process without beating yourself up. You're 17. Life is supposed to be hard. Know that it's only a phase. Trust me, if I got through that time, then so can you. You sound sweet and sensitive. I bet your parents are proud. Give yourself some room to feel bad, make mistakes, and learn from your experiences. You will get through this and eventually help someone else - I can feel it. Believe in you. Life is full of options especially as you get older. Be patient as life WILL get better.