[lil_tomato_head]

I feel my depression setting in and it feels as if i cant control it.

My life has just been throwin upside down and shakin.I was having an amazing time from june till october,I made amazing new friends stoped taking my anti deppresents and was having the time of my life.Now life is horrible i wake up crying most days though the past couple months i have been getting sicker and sicker to the point that i didnt want to do anyhting but sleep which i found out a couple weeks ago was cancer.So now im dealing with that,no top of that my Doctor just found out i was sexually abused so hes trying to get me help for that but im not ready to deal with it and he made me go back on my meds. Everything is so crazy im not sure what to do anymore but run aorund in circles.

I have the most amazing friends in the world that are trying to support me though this all but i want to be strong for them and not show them how im feeling.Im also scared im gonna lose alot of them casue i have to move home so my parents can look after me during chemo and we will just drift apart.

srry for the rant im just scared to fall in as deep as i was before and the meds only seem to be making it worse

[Sabrina]

I hate the feeling of not being able to control my depression. Sending kind and gentle thoughts your way.

[bipolar_bear]

(((((((((((((((lil tomato head))))))))))))))) You have so much on your plate right now. I hope you start to feel better soon. If you want someone to talk to feel free to PM me. I am sorry about your illness.

[lil_tomato_head]

thanks for the support im just so lost and not really ready to talk to anyone about my problems face to face yet.i just want to sit and hide under my blanket.

[heartspace]

I know what it's like to be strong for other people when really you're feeling horrible pain. It sounds from what you're saying, as if they are very supportive though, and that's wonderful. Don't feel you need to protect them from how you're feeling. True friends will be there for you through thick and thin. And they sound like true friends.

[Fuzzybear]

((((((((((((((((lil tomato head)))))))))))))))))))

[lil_tomato_head]

im trying to get it under contorl but it dosnet seem to be working every day i wake up and it seems harder and harder to get out of bed more and more things going worng in the past 2 weeks i have found out that i have to move home,i have cancer,i have had 2 cat scans,i have strep throut,a broncial infectionand now pneumonia so i have to go back for more x-rays and im scared to go back to the doctor i have to take like 25-30 pills a day and it sucks.

Oh hun

I love you anyways in spite of whatever is wrong with you

(((((lolo))))))

We will make it through this, I am here for you.

Mind you, im kind of messed up myself but then again that might help.

[(JD)]

(((hugs))))

[brianm101]

Ok. What is wrong with this picture? Correct me if I am wrong but, the only thing that changed is that you stopped taking your anti depressants. What is wrong here is that everyone wants to give you hugs than to actually help you with your problem. I can offer ((())) to every post on this forum 'but' I wouldn't help a single soul.
Go back on the anti depressants. It can't hurt. If you do and it still doesn't work then I will give you a hug.
But I will then research more and try to find more avenues for you to go down.
Hugs don't help. Solutions do.

[Sabrina]

I still enjoy receiving hugs whether they help or not. A hug may not be a tangible solution but I feel cared for, supported, understood. This is often all I need to feel a bit better, even if it is just for a while. I will continue hugging and I hope to continue receiving hugs!! And while all the hugging is going on I shall continue to look for my solution!

[(JD)]

((((hugs))))

[brianm101]

Thanks Sabrina. That is exactly my point. I love it when someone gives me a hug. Even a virtual hug. But when I am 'reaching out' about a serious problem I want someone(usually the doctor) to tell me what is wrong and not just give me a hug and tell me that they hope that I am well.
If anyone needs some additional research on a problem that they have and can't find an answer to, don't hesitate to pm me and I will do everything I can until I have exhausted every option that I have. Only then will I give you the perpetual 'hug'...